Dreaming of reality.

Well let’s see. We have Argentina claiming they were kicked out of the Falklands they never owned by the British who occupied it before Argentina existed. Notably, Argentina is keeping quiet about all the people they displaced. They have Miserable Morrisey on their side – well they can keep the whining fat idiot.

In America, Piers Morgan is insisting the Americans change their Constitution to suit him. The American government look like they agree but the American people look very much as though they most definitely don’t. America tried to get him sent back. Nope, you guys can keep him.

We still have far more idiots than we can handle here. Any other countries want some? They’re free.

Who wants the cretin who smokes, but believes that if he extracts nicotine from the cigarettes he smokes, it magically becomes a deadly poison? More – he expected his nine year old son to administer this poison, even though he thought it would kill on contact. Even more – he thought he could frame his wife’s new bloke by adding a hair to the mix. There is so much stupid in that story that I have to call on professional help to declare it.

The Mail, bathed in their natural cologne of bile and spite, keep harping on about the idiot being a smoker. They’re trying Hitler’s old trick of associating a group with a Terrible Thing but they’re just as stupid as the nicotine-extractor. Would any country like the entire Mail staff? I hear China is looking for organ donors. Just be sure not to use the brain, even if you find one.

How about the hospital and/or fire service who decided that fifteen stone is too fat to safely evacuate? That’s 210 pounds for the Americans, who I realise haven’t grasped the entire Imperial system yet.

If you’re a rugby player, don’t go to that hospital if you’re ill. If you are about six feet tall and full of muscle with no fat at all, they’ll class you as too heavy. And look at this. Just look at this:

Margaret Watt, chairperson of Scotland Patients’ Association said: ‘I’ve never heard anything like this before and it is totally unacceptable.

‘We’ve known for a long time that many people are overweight, that’s not happened overnight, so the hospital should be clever enough to cater for everyone in all areas.

She concedes that it’s ‘not all that obese’ even though, unless you are four foot six and require round doors in your house, it’s not obese at all. In many cases, not even fat. And she’s an ‘expert’.

And this! Hell’s bells!

it can not affect many, as 15 st is enormous . If people are that obese they must lose some weight before going into hospital – pete, Brighton, 14/1/2013 18:04

What is happening in Brighton? Is there a rogue lobotomist on the loose? Fifteen stone is enormous? What is Pete, I wonder? An elf, perhaps?

Then we have stories of the Government positively Savilating over the prospect of stealing more children so they can be adopted by people who don’t have children while orphanages are still full of children who are waiting for adoption.  Okay, I can’t make sense of that one either.

Speaking of children – I realise it’s no longer politically correct to refer to the Irish as stupid, but their government most certainly is. Stupid and very, very dangerous. If you were considering taking your children for a nice Irish holiday this year, reconsider. Even if you don’t smoke. They don’t have to prove you were smoking, they just have to say you were, and then they fine you. Even Stalin would be gasping in admiration.

There is no sign of sanity in the Scottish parliament either and as for the Welsh Assembly, well there’s a reason Wales voted ‘don’t care’ at devolution time. It was always going to be a loony bin. If only it had come with a regular collection day.

In Wastemonster, the MPs are demanding to be given money if they decide not to be MPs any more. If they could be given money on the basis their seat would no longer exist, fine with me. That’s not what they want. Currently they get a bag of cash if they lose their seat but not if they decide to not bother being MPs any more. Now they want to be paid for not bothering.

Most of the country thinks they already are.

Looks like a few of them plan to jump ship at the next election and want the fare to Nicaragua. Can’t we club together and send them all now?

There is so much more but I have to sleep now. I used to sleep and dream of absurdities and monsters and write them down when I woke up. Now they are all in the news.

Tonight I’ll probably dream of reality. It’s the only way to see any these days.

 

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13 thoughts on “Dreaming of reality.

  1. ‘Is there a rogue lobotomist on the loose? ‘

    Sometimes it feels as if there’s one lurking in the corridors of every school.

    It’s not clear whether ‘pete’ is some kind of health fascist or just mathematically incompetent; either is,sadly, all too plausible given the state of education in this country.

    Alternatively, perhaps he’s simply trolling the Mail comments.

  2. Speaking of children – I realise it’s no longer politically correct to refer to the Irish as stupid, but their government most certainly is.
    :)

  3. can not affect many, as 15 st is enormous

    Fifteen stone enormous? Is she fucking demented? I weigh ten and a half, and I’m a skinny little runt. All my friends weigh in at thirteen to seventeen stone. They’re not fat (well, not all of them…), just normal, bigger-than-me guys.

    It’s well past time that ‘Public Health’ was wiped off the slate as being not fit for purpose.

  4. Well the Argentinians did a fine job on their First Nation Peoples. By various means, killed every last one of them.

    The Fuegians.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuegians

    Methinks it’s got to do with oil.

    Re Scotland giving away 1% of our wealth every year once they’ve gained independence. Well they’ll have to sort out the toxic overhang of RBS and Dunfermline BS first, then sort out how they’ll cough up for OAP’s and maintain the free bus passes for over 60′s etc, etc.

    The best they can expect is to come close to Ireland which, despite their troubles, managed to cough up 0.53%.

    http://fullfact.org/factchecks/Daily_Mail_Express_Daily_Telegraph_international_aid_UK_most_generous_G8_OECD-2738

    • How will they afford it? They won’t. We will. They’ll tax the Scots to Hell and back, especially on tobacco, booze and food and anything imported from England.

      Just like every other modern government.

      • Scotland already pays more than a billion in foreign aid ( our 10% of the present UK £12Bn Aid bill) so we’ll get a discount after independence. Cool !

    • Tim Worstall is a frequent read although I don’t remember if I ever commented over there.

      I wonder what they’ll hit after sugar and salt? They’ve done fat and most carbohydrates. All that’s left is protein – and even then, they’ve long warned about the crispy bits on roast or barbecued meat, and about red meat. It’ll have to be an amino acid. Phenylalanine, perhaps? That hasn’t been hyped up for a long time.

      I think I might chance a fiver on cysteine…

      • Meanwhile sweeteners, flavour enhancers and unnecessary colourings abound; I know of a playgroup where, because of demand from mothers, the traditional glass of mid-morning milk has been rejected in favour of sugar-free, orange-flavour squash because it’s the the ‘healthy option’. I’d be interested to hear your rather more informed views on the subject.

        As for the next fashionable villain, recent BBC programme held up for ridicule a clip of film advertising eggs as a healthy food, and it looks as if the dairy industry is firmly fixed in the sights too – the Spouse heard a radio interviewee this week categorically state that cheese is bad for you.

        Both dairy products and eggs have come under fire before, but I suspect the onslaught is about to be intensified.

  5. Ban fatties from hospitals? I’ve been to A&E a few times recently and the only reason 90% of the people were there is because GPs are now way to important to visit patients out of hours and it takes a week to get an appointment. Now they are finding reasons to stop us going to hospitals too. I think the new pay grade structure in the NHS must be the more people you can tell to fuck off the more you get paid, with bonuses for finding ways to tell people its thier fault and remind them of the burden they place on your golf handicap.

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