I’ve mentioned before that a few years back, my one subscription magazine switched from New Scientist to Fortean Times. The latter has balanced and sensible articles, it is not at all credulous (as is often imagined) and it routinely rips apart stories you would think it was designed to believe are real. The former used to do that too, but has degenerated into a mouthpiece for the Climatologists and the Puritans.
The X-files TV series used to start with ‘The truth is out there’, and then we’d have another episode of Muddler and Scully running around after monsters Scully didn’t even believe existed. It was a fun series. I still have the VHS tapes somewhere, but of course they’re worthless now. The enduring mystery of that show was – why did the porn-obsessed Muddler never once try it on with the incredibly sexy Scully? I would have, even before the start of filming on episode one! Yet he remained content with sticky screens when he spent every day with a beautiful woman. That is the only paranormal aspect left to explore – had Muddler’s habit affected his eyesight that badly?
But then, if I had been Muddler and made a pass at Scully I’d have faced, years later, the same accusations as Lord Rennard keeps facing even though he’s been cleared of those charges. Okay, ‘No evidence of wrongdoing’ doesn’t mean he didn’t do it but if nobody can prove he did do it, then in law, he didn’t.
Therein lies the rub. Just because nobody can prove you did something, that is not proof that you didn’t do it. Once accused, you are presumed guilty forever. Whether you actually did what you are accused of is no longer relevant. A ‘credible accusation’ is all it takes now. Look at what the pocket Speaker’s unfeasibly tall wife did to Lord McAlpine with a quick tap of the keyboard on Twitter. That wasn’t even a credible accusation and yet she dragged an innocent man into the quagmire of the Savilators in less than 140 characters.
Lord Rennard refuses to apologise and he is right to continue to refuse. He has been cleared of wrongdoing. If he apologises he will be admitting guilt. Is he guilty? I don’t know. I wasn’t there. The law says ‘not’, but if he issues an apology he changes his plea to ‘guilty’ and from that point on, he is damned.
Dead Jim Saliva has been accused of literally hundreds of terrible things. Not one of which has been proven. No need. He’s dead. You can accuse him of anything and he can’t answer the charge. Is he guilty of at least some of them? Maybe. Well, in fact, probably. He was a famous DJ in the seventies and surrounded by young girls so I’d guess he took advantage of at least some. I’m sure it was morally reprehensible by modern standards but standards were very different in the 1970s. I could go into a shop and buy a brown paper bag containing two pounds of sodium chlorate in 1976. I did, often, and bought the other components in different shops. It was on general sale as a weedkiller. I used it to blow things up. You just try buying it now. You’ll get a dawn raid and face charges of ‘possessing a thing a terrorist might maybe use perhaps’ or some such nonsense. Even if your garden is overgrown with weeds.
Saliva has been declared a paedophile but none of the claims are from those who were five at the time, are they? He was (might have been – no proof has come forth) meddling with teenagers. Some might have been under 16 but did he know? Hell, at my age, anyone under 30 is a child. I could not tell if a girl was 15 or 20 and with my looks it’s not likely I’ll ever have to take the risk.
Then there is Boring Ken from Coronation Street. He apparently once sniffed Ena Sharples’ bloomers or maybe he gave Minnie Caldwell an attack of the vapours or some such thng. Also the garage bloke from the same programme, Dave Lee Travis the old-time DJ, several comedians who are not right-on Leftie twats, and Rolf Harris. It does not read like a police investigation. It reads like a pogrom of Kruschev’s invention.
None of the charges are proven but when you look at the papers it’s all ‘Ooo, he did this and then he did that and isn’t it just awful and then the nasty man did the diddly thing with his diddler’ and it looks like the first draft of a Frankie Howerd sketch. They can’t get him. He was gay so he’s exempt on the grounds of political correctness. Did you notice there has not been even one instance of same-sex kiddie-fiddling in all this? Or even any actual kiddies?
There is no truth any more. Accusation is the new truth. Accusation now proves guilt. No need for expensive trials and tedious jury service. I say you did it, you must apologise and if you do – gotcha. You apologised for it so you must have done it. Why else would you apologise?
I will never apologise for second hand smoke because the effects claimed for it are not real. I will not apologise for the delight of cracking open another bottle of whisky because, well, fuck you, that’s why. I have never, in over a year of part-time janitoring, apologised to any staff or customer unless it was absolutely my fault. They all apologise to me daily. Someone I know well has said ‘I’m not surprised’ but I have no idea what he means.
Climatology. Smokophobia. Boozeophobia. Salt terror. Lately, the Evil Sugar. And so many others. There is little to no truth out there any more.
Will we ever find the truth again?
If Muddler can take one hand off the bishop’s hat and visit Specsavers, he might be of some use.