The vegans are after pork now.

All this stuff about ‘ooh, all the meat is Halal’ is nonsense. Really. That lamb chop is a bit of a dead baby. You can angst about it if you like, I’m going to eat it. And not just one. They are small.

I have snared rabbits and they aren’t always dead when you find them. Sometimes they don’t go through the snare right and just get trapped instead of garotted. It’s nasty, that’s true. I had no money and needed to eat so I got over it. I have clubbed trout and other fish to death after hauling them from the water with a metal hook jammed into their lips. There is no way to make that sound nice. It isn’t. I don’t ‘play’ fish, I haul them out with a big, fast spinner reel and strong line – or drag them quickly with the fly line. On the spinner I use, the buggers hydroplane in and get flipped onto the bank instead of being gently lifted out in a net before being bludgeoned to death.  They don’t get time to work out what’s going on. I do not fish for sport. I fish to eat.

(Lidl currently have fishing gear including a very nice spinner reel for £14, if you’re of the fish-munching fraternity).

If you want to eat meat than something has to die. It can be humane but is that a real thing? You’re still going to kill it. Okay, there is a big difference between what a cat does to a mouse before killing it and the fast bite of a deadly spider but in the end, the living thing becomes meat.

Vegetarians and vegans can’t cope with that and that’s perfectly okay. It is, let’s face it, nasty. If you can live without the nasty stuff then why not? But if you really like to eat meat then you have to accept that it’s something that was once alive and then died.

I like to make it clear. A poached egg in a chicken curry is ‘mother and baby curry’. Lamb is eating babies, eggs are consuming the unborn. If there ever comes a time when I can’t deal with that then at least I can say I was honest about it. I knew exactly what I was doing and still do. I am not lying to myself or anyone else – I eat dead things and I like it.

I could get into the whole ‘You know, that lettuce leaf is still alive when you rip it apart with your teeth’ but I eat lettuce too. Also radishes and carrots (they are better raw) and lots of other vegetable and fruit foods. I eat anything. Don’t stay still too long.

I have long wondered whether the whole ‘It’s all Halal, you know’ was an attempt to put us off eating meat altogether. The Green Cult want us all vegan, living on lentils and tofu and while that might sustain life, it doesn’t seem to me to be much of a life. Okay if you like it, but it’s not for me.

It is definitely not beyond the Green Cult to enlist the vegetarian and vegan fundamentalists to their cause. Definitely not beyond either group to make wild and unsubstantiated claims to put us off meat. Not even beyond them to actually lie.

Nicked from the vegans on Farcebok –

farrowingThis is called a farrowing crate. Sows go in there when they are about to give birth. It has a reason.

The sow might weigh 300 kg, the piglets will be 1 kg or less when born. The ones in the picture have just been popped. Sows don’t think to check whether there are piglets beneath them when they decide to sit and 300 kg sitting on 1 kg has only one messy result. I have, more than once, rescued a piglet when its mother decided to lean against a wall and wasn’t concerned by the squealing of her trapped baby.

They are not in there for two and a half years. They are in there until the piglets get old enough and smart enough to get the hell out of the way when Mum sits down. This arrangement lets the sow suckle her young without killing them and is not intended to be deliberate and unecessary cruelty as the vegans pretend.

It is also not for the benefit of the animal. Let’s be fair here, it is so that the farmer does not lose too many piglets to the ‘sod it, I can pop ten at a time anyway’ attitude of the sow. It both is and isn’t for the benefit of ‘the peeeglets’.

The only meat they cannot put us off with ‘Halal’ is pork. There is no such thing as Halal or Kosher pork. It cannot exist. Bacon is always a safe bet, which is as it should be because bacon is the food of the Gods. That’s why the Gods don’t want you to eat any. It accelerates thought and gives you psychic powers and the Gods don’t want you having any of that.

If God did not intend us to eat animals then He would not have made them out of meat. There are nutritional reasons to eat meat too but stuff it. I can’t be bothered. There are perfectly valid reasons, based on personal morality and preferences, to not eat meat.

I am not religious. I do not care at all if someone else decides that religion defines their life. It’s their life. I only get fractious when someone declares that their beliefs should control my life. Look guys, even I can’t control my life. You have no chance.

The vegetables (fundamentalist veggies) are trying the same thing now. You fundie veggies want to ban all meat?

You are made of meat. When you succeed in banning all other sources of meat, it would be wise to keep that in mind.

Nom nom nom.


68 thoughts on “The vegans are after pork now.

  1. To use the argument, against veggies and vegans, that their diet involves killing also, is a valid one. It doesn’t matter whether you eat veg (even lettuce) too, that isn’t the point. The point is their hypocrisy. Veggies and vegans will even seek out and delight in rearing and then eating, straight out of the ground ….. baby vegetables! And the rearing of most vegetables also specifically prevents a crop from ‘going to seed’ and so restricting the reproductive mechanism, ensuring all produce is in a tender and ‘virgin’ condition. It’s all the most disgusting perversion and cruelty.

    And besides, the turning over of land to mass agricultural production (of veggies and grain) involves mass killing and subsequent extinction of thousands (millions) of organisms, including all birds and small mammals, that previously existed on the said land.

    “…..and the first commandment reads, that human flesh and blood is sacred – until there is no more food!”

    At least according to The Stranglers anyway.


  2. My favoured response to fundieveggies is
    “So you want to make cows, sheep, pigs, and more extinct?”
    Nobody is going to keep them for free.

    Stanglers – geat band. And they even got George Melly involved. The filthy old bugger.


  3. Tangential, but semi-related to the diet fascism theme:

    read an article on The Grauniad site earlier today (don’t judge me, I clicked the link by mistake). It was an uncredited editorial arguing (decreeing?) that – thanks to rising populations – the previously halal idea of GM crops must now be acceptable to the useful idiots of the Eco-Righteous. “We have always been at war with Eurasia.”

    The headline was classic Righteous: “There’s no choice: we must grow GM crops now”. I mean, wow. Even before reaching the imperative (“We must!”) they’re already attempt to close down any dissenting voices. The whole article is a specimen-perfect sample of *that* mindset in action.

    The comments thread (locked, naturlich) is a hilarious car crash of conflicting non-solutions, hobby-horses, and “We need to…” arguments, all whittering away in the penumbra cast by the grim-faced shade of Thomas Malthus.


    • “read an article on The Grauniad site earlier today (don’t judge me, I clicked the link by mistake).”

      No, no, if you had clicked by mistake, you would surely have swiftly exited without bothering to read? You clicked the link because you feel it is expedient to keep a weather eye ‘pon the enemy. And there’s nothing wrong with that. We must use these convenient links as a ready source of intel re our foes.

      Having said that, I often (and no doubt subconsciously) make some feeble excuse for seeing things in the esteemed Daily Mirror. I always hasten to say ‘I just came by it’ or some such guff. The truth of the matter is it’s always to be found at my parent’s house ……… because they think it gives them – I dunno – working-class ‘cred’ or something. Actually because they probably don’t know better. I treat the publication as a comic-book, especially that ‘celebrity’ page.

      We do know that vegans and other ‘progressives’ will subject dogs (and no doubt cats?) to veggie (if not vegan) diets. There’s no doubt in my mind they would do exactly the same to lions and crocodiles too, if they had the power to do so. After all, they impose it on their own kids, so anything is possible…..

      The Oceania/Eurasia reference is no more demonstrated than with leftists paradox over how to view Russia.

      Good post anyway.


  4. I’ve got this loose floozy of the vegetarian variety. Couple days ago I cooked up a delicious rare steak while she was over. All lovely and juicy and bloody it was. She looked on with a strange visceral mixture of predatory fascination and abject horror.

    “It’s all bloody!, she said! “Ugh!”

    “I’ve never seen ANYONE eat anything like that before!”
    (bear in mind she’s pushing forty)

    “But what if the cow has a different blood type to you?”, she said in all seriousness.

    This why it is folly to expect any kind of reasoned argument from the lettuctarian lobby. Lack of animal fat and protein has stunted their brain development.


      • The other day she got upset by my insistence that HIV almost certainly came from Africa and not some ultra secretive lizard/NWO lab in the US. She also believes me to be the descendant of slave owners as if that’s something to be ashamed of?

        Some of her antics are highly entertaining, however, but I take no guff off the bint. Also, she is a convicted racist, so she has some redeeming qualities. And a while back she got chucked of an anti-EDL march for saying “paki shop”.


    • “But what if the cow has a different blood type to you?”

      Oh. I could have rolled with that one. I’d have told her that the butcher always asks what blood type you are before selecting the meat.

      Also that everyone AB- has to become vegetarian, or eat only veal, or they’ll die horribly.

      Today I asked one of the lovely simple girls at work whether the raspberry-flavoured pig faces in the sweets (yes, really) were Halal. She started checking the packet. I failed to keep a straight face.


  5. That photo makes me think of suckling pig. Gosh, I want one now. I wonder what my floozy would make of that? Veal is for lightweights.


  6. Had a group on holiday in the hotel in Glencoe one year from California.

    Would only eat things from plants that did not involve killing the plant. So Fruit, nuts etc.

    “Fruitarians” they called themselves.

    “Fucking nutters” was my description.


    • Would only eat things from plants that did not involve killing the plant. So Fruit, nuts etc.

      But fruit and nuts aren’t dead. They all have a very small metabolic rate.

      Plant seeds represent a special biological system: They remain in a dormant state with a significantly reduced metabolism and are thus able to withstand harsh environmental conditions for extended periods.

      About the only things we eat that aren’t alive is stuff like salt and sugar. And, of course, they ban those!


      • I was gonna mention seeds but y’all beat me to it. Have you seen strawberries for example? Covered in little, innocent seeds. Other fruits have them concealed inside – so vegetarians can be in denial and pretend they don’t know they’re there. It’s murderous hypocrisy.


        • I’m quite partial to a bit of fruit and nut, I’ll have you know. Even the odd seed. I hope you’re not coming on all holier than thou? Not here, surely?


    • You’ve never heard of the Breatharians then, Furor? They take it one step further. I must admit I do admire the founder of their organistion who was caught enjoying a chicken pie and outed. Several deluded fools have actually died attempting to achieve Breatharian perfection.


      • Didn’t the Breatharian thing start out as a piss-take in Warren Ellis’ Transmetropolitan comics? You’re joking, right?


        Oh dear, oh dear.


        • Far be it for a good little Calvinist like me to endorse anything ‘evolutionary’, or anything connected to that Godless heathen, Charles Darwin, but didn’t he have a charitable trust set up for such gullible hapless types? The Darwin Awards? They probably deserve one.


    • They eat plant babies? I am shocked.

      Almost as shocked as seeing cut flowers in people’s houses. ‘You display plant genitalia and sniff them? Disgusting.’

      InterFlora hate me.


  7. This non-fundamentalist veggie seconds everything above, except the aspersions on my brain development. Any impairment is entirely due to recreational drugs.

    I admit that I once used to be a little bit smug about being a veggie, but it’s become something of an embarrassment. For me, it’s not about health or ethics or right-on. I just never liked the stuff, from being a kid. I don’t want everyone else to be veggies, the farm animals need to earn a living or they won’t be there to augment the countryside.

    The only tasty or useful threatened species, (animal or vegetable), are the ones that farmers can’t own.

    I also recognize the usefulness of vivisection.


    • Similar to you Zaphod, been non-meat for about 30 years (but not even a tiny bit smug). Couldn’t care less what other people eat.


    • I have a hard time believing ANYONE can simply just ‘dislike’ it..

      I always assumed the “I don’t like it” argument was the last resort of vegetarians who have become just sufficiently awakened to be embarrassed by their own hairshirt denialism. It’s smacks of the desire to kill the debate before it’s gotten underway.

      Seriously, what’s to dislike about it? Meat is just the most delicious thing ever on God’s green earth.


      • If God didn’t want us to eat animals, He wouldn’t have made them out of meat.

        Seriously though, I have known a few people who didn’t eat meat but had no moral or religious agenda. They really just didn’t like it very much. I also knew one lab technician, long ago, who was involved in some of the early and not-so-tightly-controlled animal experiments who became vegetarian as a result.

        He wasn’t a fundamentalist vegetable, he was happy to sit opposite someone eating a bacon roll and I’d known him for about a year before I found out he was veggie. Likewise the ones who just don’t like meat – they don’t care about making us all veggie, they just don’t like eating meat.

        The moral ones are the worst. They cannot grasp that their morals are not everyone else’s morals.


        • My floozy is the pragmatic sort of fundamentalist, I’d say. She comes on all ideological or horrified and disgusted when it suits her – ie. When there is the potential for amusing drama. But on another occasion she happily brought me a delicious sausage and bacon baguette when she was after brownie points. Contrary creature to say the least. Bless her. Bet it was her, or one of her small clan, gave me this cold!


          • Children are horribly unhygienic things. They spread diseases that they can recover from in an hour but which will flatten an adult for a week.

            The Pied Piper was right to lead the cheeeldren away, they are worse than the rats.


    • Actually, it might be drug consumption in my floozy’s case. I am reluctant to lay the blame at the door of the multiple cans of Carlsberg Special Brew she drinks daily as we all know that’s a child’s drink. 9% lager is for lightweights.

      I am only lambasting her publicly because last night she informed me that she’d just put on a sex show with some other loose tart to get money for brandy and bagels – not the literal variety, but rather the sort one has to make a phone call for and then meet up away from the roving eye of cctv.

      I don’t care about that so much, but that I could tell she was fishing for a way to try to lay the blame for her loose ways on my shoulders AND claim the moral high ground for my refuse to help clean up her and her son’s mess in her fucking flat.

      I am however quite fond of the crazy tart. Her antics amuse me endlessly, so I keep her about, and won’t just dump her like Right Wing Git suggests, and won’t permit anyone else to lambast or mock her, such is my perverse sense of loyalty. She can more than fight her own battles. Mostly I keep quiet when she’s spouting ill-informed bollocks – saves my poor eardrums getting battered.

      Females, eh? Don’t you just love them?


      • You can hear equally crazy batshit from well-brought-up, middle-class girls with good jobs. And it takes a great deal more time, effort and money to get anything out of them.
        Sounds like you’re on a good ting.


        • You know I don’t really keep her around for that. Well not much, anyway. She is actually a good sport most of the time and funny as fuck, despite the batshitshit ess.

          But you’re right about the posh ones. They are just as ruined. In some ways moreso. They’re all ruined actually, our womenvolk. It’s actually something of a tragedy.

          The most honorable and decent female in my circle is still screwed up in so many ways, not to mention 10years older than me, so not exactly marriageable material. No qualms about eating meat though. Last time she visited she acquired a seemingly endless supply of purloin steaks to keep us fed. Perhaps I should marry her, in fact? She is of good Germanic stock too…


    • I suppose I came on a little carnist-fundamentalist there, Zaphod. But to put it in context I was a little pumped up earlier this evening owing to some alleged chicanery tangentially related to the acquisition of more steak(yes really). Also, I seem to be developing a cold which never fails to bring out the wild temperamental celt in me just before it’s about to set in. But this latest steak was bloody delicious. And I still find it hard to fathom how anyone can REALLY dislike the stuff(?) I know from my own youthful phase of vegetarian folly just how insincere I really was about it.

      Red meat is supposed to be good for colds, isn’t it? At least that’s what my granny always used to say…


      • As a kid I wouldn’t eat any meat except sausages. Even for Xmas dinner. (My mum despaired.)

        In my teens I can remember a couple of formal meal occasions where eating meat was required, I made the attempt but it was traumatic.

        But then the hippies invented being veggie! (?)
        Instead of saying “I don’t like meat”, I could say “I’m a veggie.”
        No longer some kinda wimp, just a principled aesthete!

        It probably is psychological, but I don’t need to fight it. It’s just a minor inconvenience, if that. A bit like lactose intolerance, I guess, but less of a problem. (I love cheese, and eggs)
        Any “health” benefits should be cancelled out by the rest of my lifestyle.

        If they ever try to ban meat, I’ll be with you on the barricades. Eating meat is natural. (Though not actually necessary, my experiment proves. I’ve eaten none for over 40 years and I’m unreasonably fit.)

        Enjoy! 🙂


        • XX But then the hippies invented being veggie! (?) XX

          Not quite.

          I believe even the ancient Greeks had such a group. In recent times, Hitler, and Himmler. (Although I am not sure Himmler WAS a vegy, but he proposed it as an aim for his “New order of the SS.” Which were to come into being after the war was won. Although he did make a start at Wewelsberg. (Who immediately told him to fuck off.))


    • They think the bacteria all survive. Some get through, but with every spoonful of yoghurt, millions die. Every spoonful is like the Cambodian Killing Fields. Every time.


  8. I have no qualms about eating meat, and I have hunted and killed for the table on a number of occasions in the past. I think many people nowadays are unable to make the association between the neat clingfilmed nest of pork chops sitting in their little polystyrene tray on the supermarket cold shelf and a grunting live pig. Christ, a lot of inner city kids don’t even know what a cow looks like, let alone that they’re eating bits of a dead one in their Big Macs. I’m sure a lot of urbanites today would become immediate vegetarians if they were given a tour of a slaughterhouse, so unaware are they of the source of their food.

    I mentioned somewhere (maybe here?) not so long ago that in my travelling days I found myself living in a room in Chitral just above the local butcher’s yard, where he would daily slaughter a cow according to the edicts of Islam. One day, I really fancied a bit of liver fried up with some onions, and arranged with a local cookhouse that I would bring some along for them to cook for me the following day. So next morning, as I heard the unfortunate beast groaning it’s last, I nipped down to the butcher to ask for some liver. Ah, liver. He took me out the back where the animal was being butchered, cut out the whole liver from the very recently deceased cow and handed it to me, quivering, warm and bloody. No wrapping. It was fucking huge, and kept trying to slip out of my hands, which by this time were slick with blood. Have you ever tried holding on to a large piece of bloody liver? It ain’t easy! Heh! Veggie? Not me! And I had to carry it a couple of hundred yards through the bazaar to the guy who was going to cook it for me, slithering and steaming in its bid to escape my clutches.

    It seemed nobody round there really ate that kind of stuff (do Muslims not eat offal? Dunno), so he was glad to give me the lot. Sadly, although I did my best, I was only able to eat a small fraction of it, and the rest went to the dogs. No refrigerators in that part of the world in those days, so it couldn’t be kept. I think Lapsed Puritan’s floozy friend would have had a fainting fit had she been witness to that little scenario that morning! I thought it was a hoot, and so did the locals as they watched me hurrying down the road trying to control this thing.


    • Perhaps if you’d put a lead on it you could have walked it back to yours instead of carrying it? Remind me of that bit of urban wisdom that say that if you leave a chunk of fresh liver on a work surface next to a glass of delicious full fat milk the liver will start inching towards it – while your back is turned though, naturally.

      Gods, I’m hungry now, so thanks for that!

      Just need some onions to go with…


      • Perhaps if you’d put a lead on it you could have walked it back to yours instead of carrying it?

        Hmmm. Dirt road, so would have picked up a bit of dust en route. But it would have avoided the jelly juggling act, true…


  9. All veggie-only eaters eat meat and probably their own flesh at that.

    About 75% of the ‘dust’ in homes and restaurants is cast off dead human skin cells.

    Each 7.5 cm X 10 cm(3″ X 4″) patch of skin, the back of your hand, casts off about 12,000 dead skin cells per minute.

    Those dead, decaying, and rotting skin cells of yours will create a mist of your dead skin around you.

    You breathe them in and they settle on your veggies on your plate. As you lift those veggies to your mouth they will pick up an ever larger coating of your decaying, rotting, airborne ex-skin.

    That creepy, unwashed old man, two tables over, you are also eating some of his dead skin cells.

    The top 25 or so layers of skin cells are dead cells just waiting to be cast off.

    When you lick your fingers, you are ingesting thousands of your dead cells onto your lips and into your mouth.

    Sounds like something Dr. Leggy might write.


    • I can work that alongside my current tale of ‘smoking has been in the UK for over 400 years and the ash never rots, so all that grey dust you see is tobacco ash. There is no record of any grey dust in the UK before 1600, you know. Go on, you try and find any mention of it anywhere in any history book’.

      The drones will believe both. They’ve been well conditioned into doublethink.


  10. My niece was describing the benefits of veggie-love one Thanksgiving. I pointedly looked at her plate, and the baked ham and piece of fried chicken thereon.

    She had the self-awareness to flush a bit, then said, “Well, I’m no fanatic.”


    • I don’t actually mind a bit of honest-to-goodness hypocrisy. After all, why should be live by the standards we set for others? That’s the mark of a superior individual, that is.

      Sounds like a good sort your niece. I should reward her with a nice tender leg of lamb, or some such.

      Good username, by the way. Isn’t Razorback also the title of a film set in the Australian outback? Giant bulletproof murderous hog on the rampage or some such. If I were ever to suffer pains of carnivore guilt(not likely) it certainly wouldn’t be for pigs. They are more than willing to eat us given the opportunity.


      • When my youngest daughter was visiting a couple of years ago, she was going through a veggie phase. So I bought some fillet steak to put on the BBQ and just showed it to the hot coals briefly.

        “Oh well”, she said, “I suppose I can eat meat just this once. But only to please you, Dad.” Nom, nom, nom, slurp, nom nom. “Hey, that was actually really good…”

        Got some good red wine down her neck, too. She was looking pasty, and needed the iron. 🙂


      • Oh, and re the pigs, not only are they willing to eat us, but they used to be the Goan latrine cleaners, waiting under the loo seats above the open ditch. They liked ’em hot and steaming. Not too fussy, pigs.


      • Aye, here in Italy a Mafia Don is on trial for feeding a couple of rivals to his pigs. Alive.

        The cops have a tape of him boasting to a friend about the screams…


First comments are moderated to keep the spambots out. Once your first comment is approved, you're in.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s