Warm and squishy.

Local Shop does not sell nappies. That’s okay, I am nowhere near old enough to need them yet. They certainly wouldn’t put them next to the beer or we’d be picketed by the ‘For the Cheeldren’ loonies for promoting Stella to those incapable of reading the labels.

Sure it is easy to confuse shoppers because most of them are shoppers second and idiots first. If they were to apply a slight touch of thinking to their trolley-rally experience they’d do so much better but that is not in any shop’s interest. Selling the stupid ones things they don’t need is a much better business plan. It does not work on everyone.

‘Alcohol is the aisle you end up in after you have got all your provisions,’ says Mr Adcock.(7)

I assume the number in brackets is his age. He is wrong in my case. Alcohol is the aisle I start out in. As for ‘selfishness’, I am buying for me, with money I worked for, so where does ‘selfishness’ come into it? Should I be handing the Big Issue seller at the door a bag of groceries? Get stuffed. I have paid enough taxes to cover his income support and his brood back in Romania, I am going to feed myself with what I have left.

But, as I said, Local Shop does not sell nappies. Lots of little children appear in the place nonetheless, and Rentokil say they have nothing to get rid of them. All my suggestions to solve the problem have been summarily dismissed and at least two were threatened with police action.

And yet… it seems that even primary school children are still wearing nappies.

Hmmm. So the extreme elderly and incontinent wear them and now, older and older children wear them. Eventually it must meet in the middle.

I suspect a ploy by Big Nappy (or maybe Big Log)  to make them a lifelong addiction.

Or maybe, a Government conspiracy designed to destroy the Frank Hovis show –

We’ll probably never know.



7 thoughts on “Warm and squishy.

  1. Potty training is a snap. We have twins; double trouble, so we places pots strategically around the house and removed them one by one until only the bigjob toilet remained.


  2. Kids going to school in nappies is blatantly daft. Seems pretty fundamental, to me, that parents should potty train as soon as their kids can toddle. If this is being neglected then what else is going wanting? Tis a strange world we live in and getting stranger by the day.


    • What does not kill you only makes you… stranger.

      It’s a fun world whe viewed from my perspective, but for those who want a future, maybe not so funny.


  3. My wife is a School Meals Supervisor Operative (Dinner lady), which she has done for the last 30 years. She sees no real decrease in children’s ability, she does see an increase in the parents of those children to take offense at anything they see as negative to their children, and an increasing number of complaints from parents. So is it our generation that is looking for excuses ?


    • Ah, the dinner ladies were the best adults at school. They were the ones who gave us food. Proper, stodgy food and custard you could eat with a fork.

      It’s not our generation but the following ones that will live on excuses and compensation. Until they have wiped out business altogether. Which was the plan all along, it was only the weapon that was hiding.


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