Dry January

Well, Stimpy has been called away to cover for another shop so I’m on longer hours this week. Hopefully this is a very temporary situation and it’s not heading back to the seven-days-a-week and random shifts that precipitated my last attempt at resigning. My plan is to not do another Christmas in the shop. I plan to take my time and find some better-paid job I really want to do, not grab the first one available, but if it gets back to the madness that was before, then I will revise my plan to Easter.

So now we are into the bunch-of-CRUKs’ Dry January and I am pleased to report that I have failed to comply every single day so far. Tonight I have Isle of Skye, a blend of malts with an 8-year tag which means the youngest malt in there is 8 years old. Better yet, a small amount from the profits on each bottle goes to a Scottish mountain rescue charity – a real one – so the bottle has the tagline ‘Every bottle sold saves lives’. Stick that up your arse and shatter it, CRUK.

The donation to a real life-saving charity could be so much more, if only the government didn’t take most of the price of the bottle to give to a life-controlling ‘charity’.

The CRUKs want us all to stop drinking and to give them all the money we save by not drinking. I have a better idea.

I will keep the money I’d save by not drinking whisky and spend it on whisky. In tonight’s case, a whisky that includes a donation to a real charity instead of to a Government shill group who are nothing more than a front for lifestyle dictatorship.

I would add the donation I had planned to give to CRUK to the whisky fund for this month but sadly it would not make a penny of difference.

Perhaps I will donate again to Scottish Mountain Rescue tomorrow. Certainly a few more times this month. Every bottle I drink helps just a tiny bit so the more I drink, the more lives I help save. I’m saving the lives of idiots who climb up mountains and get stuck. Something I would never do. They made that life decision and instead of condemning them for it and declaring that they are a cost to the NHS and should be allowed to die, I am donating a little to help rescue them.

It’s a nice feeling, being good to people who had some bad luck and are suffering for it. It feels so much better than just sneering at them and whining about money at them and moaning about all the bother of helping them out. You Puritans might want to consider giving that attitude a try sometime.

Certainly beats CRUK’s idea of giving up what you enjoy and paying them to help you suffer. That’s a definite Puritan trait right there.

So, who is the good guy here? CRUK, or the whisky seller? You decide.

It’s a very nice whisky too, and not very expensive. Give it a go. You might donate the last few pennies that save that stranded mountain climber.

If you like to climb up mountains (I can see no reason for it beyond a rumour of free whisky at the top) then maybe this drunken bum will one day save your life.

You can thank me later in cash.



7 thoughts on “Dry January

  1. Every bottle of Skye helps a real charity with 15p. That might sound mean, but the duty and VAT on a bottle of £20 whisky is £11.23. The distillery probably makes very little.

    I noticed in early December that the big supermarkets were selling big name spirits for £15 a litre, The tax element is £13.79. How does this work? Who is making the £1.21 “profit”? Obviously, these are loss leaders, but quite a loss, I would say.

    It’s probably why – going back to a discussion several posts ago – the Morrison’s customer was only allowed to buy two bottles after his long bus trip.

    This vast taxation pays for an army of “lifestyle” monitors and dictators and fake experts and bent statisticians to destroy the industries that effectively pay their inflated salaries.

    Here’s a good one about why the SNP cannot run an economy: they proposed even higher taxes on whisky – just whisky!

    Senior SNP advisers have called for as much as £1 per bottle to be levied on Scotch whisky in an attempt to help the country share in the success of the global export

    And they have just further reduced the legal limit for driving, which is now so low that you can’t even risk having a couple of glasses of anything the night before you intend driving to work. I read that it will likely close more pubs than the smoking ban.

    Being genetically predisposed not to be capable of handling alcohol, I have been ‘dry’ for nearly 17 years, with God’s grace, so I don’t have a vested interest other than I hate several things: over-taxation, hypocrisy, stupidity (killing the Golden Goose), unemployment, the loss of the country’s main meeting places and the government’s ‘lifestyle’ dictatorship achieved through bullying and telling lies.

    Liked by 1 person

      • I don’t know if there’s a name for it but I know people who keel over after a glass of wine and others who can down a bottle of spirits. Variability is possibly key here.

        Also some can stop drinking when it starts to hurt and others just keep going, Again – variability.


        • The name for this condition is “alcoholism” which is a hideous disease which robbed me of several years. I was fortunate as I have met people trapped for most of their lives. They still mostly retain a much higher level of humanity than most of the individuals who lord over us with their self-appointed notions of morality.

          I like alcoholics. I try to help them; not in a nannying way, but I’ll never forget how hard it is. I used to live round the corner from a “B&B” where the council sent them to be housed. Like smokers, they are lepers in today’s society. Probably always were, really. I like them as friends because you don’t expect anything from them, so when they do something nice for you, it’s really appreciated and sober friends I find are generally self-righteous, self-centred, self-loathing people who won’t mind disowning you over some theological disagreement.


  2. XX share in the success of the global export XX

    Well, THAT is a new term for theft and extortion!

    In fact, the dictatorship is making so much money out of whiskey, “for the good of the country” that distillery workers should get evereything from their pay, to VAT, totaly tax free. After all, without their efforts, the dictatorships would not be getting a penny for the product of their labour.


  3. It’s going the same way with petrol at the moment. Very little of the cost is producing and retailing at the rest, the really big bit is duty and VAT.

    This “cost to the NHS”? We all pay into it one way or another. How much do we pay over our lifetimes? A huge amount. How many of use actually cost the NHS more than the lifetimes contributions? Very few.

    The profits from whisky making are declared in London and taxed there, just like the big corporations who declare in Luxumberg or Ireland etc. no sign of Cameron taking them to task and embarrassing them into declaring in Scotland.

    It’s all smoke and mirrors stuff by politicians.


  4. Pingback: Week 1 round up - Drinkuary

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