Run! The doctor is coming!

This seven days a week working is taking its toll. Not on my health, I didn’t have much of that to start with and what’s left is pickled in whisky, salt and curry. Blogging might become sporadic unless we get a replacement for Stimpy soon. Twitter is easier, one-sentence jabberings fit between real life things, so I’ll be around on there most days but here, things might slow down.

Boss has two possibles for interview next week. No dolly birds though. I’m beginning to suspect she’s only accepting male candidates to keep my mind on my work. Dammit. She’s wrong. If she employs an attractive woman my age, I’ll be an hour early for work every day. At this stage though, I don’t care if she employs a chimp called Sebastian as long as it cuts my hours.

It has come to my notice that, in the 28 years between my hospital visits, not much has changed. Not even the sheets. They are still itchy. The food is still bland and awful, but at least it’s edible as long as you choose the bland option. One thing has changed though, and it has changed in a big way.

The visit 28 years ago was filled with people who wanted to fix me. The recent visit was filled with people who wanted to control me.

‘Don’t drink!’ If I didn’t drink I wouldn’t be in here getting broken ribs and a bashed kidney sorted out. So wouldn’t thousands of others and then you’d all be out of a job. ‘I have Life Advice!’ You weren’t even born last time I was in here. If I want life advice I’ll listen to those who have been doing it longer than me, not those who have been at it less than half as long as I have.

One of the doctors was trying to give up smoking. I recommended Electrofag. He looked at me as though I had recommended heroin. It would still be a better bet than his Pharmer-pushed patches and gum. He will fail because he doesn’t really want to stop – and that is the only real way to stop. It’s not an addiction. Everyone I know who ‘successfully’ gave up smoking did it because they didn’t feel like smoking any more. They didn’t ‘give it up’. They stopped a habit that was no longer enjoyable for them.

Just as the time I gave up trainspotting. It stopped being fun so I stopped doing it. No other reason has ever, nor will ever, work. If you get to where it’s not fun any more you will stop just like that. The withdrawal symptoms are only in your head and have been put there by the patch-sellers. They are not real.

Medicine has moved from ‘fix the sick and damaged’ to ‘control the lives of everyone so we don’t need to do any work’. Yet they cannot see that if we all live as directed then there is no further logical need for any of them. Why pay billions into a service nobody needs?

We especially don’t need a ‘service’ that is so bad that people leave the country because of it.

Medics, get your act together or just admit you are quacks and clear off. Your job is to fix us when we are infected or damaged. It is not your job to tell us how to live. Our lives do not belong to you, no matter how Righteous you think you are. You are human and you are going to die too. Live your life while you have it. I’ll live mine. Mine is not yours. Mine is better because I waste none of it on trying to live anyone else’s life for them.

I have been drinking with medical students in the past and I would never trust my health to anyone who can get far drunker than me.

The medics are human.

What they have lost sight of is that… so are we.

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18 thoughts on “Run! The doctor is coming!

  1. It’s like a car bodywork repair shop ordering you to go on a driving course.

    Now, this might happen when the shop is owned by the insurance company, and there we see the parallel.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. But are they in the business of healing people? They treat people, by that I mean they treat the symptoms. Treatment produces profit for big pharma.

    Whilst the quacks witter on about health guff we just ignore it and do our own thing. Take stuff if it’s truly necessary and stay away from Docs.

    There are exceptions. If you get a serious injury, infection or disease then that’s different. But once sorted, if that’s possible, no long term medication.

    Scottish Granny says keep a few extra pounds on your body which will be a reserve should you get ill. Keep warm and do all things within moderation. Not all docs are quacks and switch off when the quacks start their dribble.

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  3. “Tony says: ‘She said, “Listen to me, it’s going to be done today whether you like it or not because it has to be done within ten days.””

    Just posted on this over at ‘Orphans’. The NHS doesn’t work for the patients, it works for the NHS, and never ever forget it.

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    • I knew there was a reason I picked the name ‘Sebastian’. It was in the ‘unfiled pile’ that contains pretty much all my memories.
      Pity he’s dead though. He could have joined us for smoke breaks too. He’d have fitted right in!

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  4. I suspect the health Nazi problems they had was due to Common Purpose, which is an endemic infection throughout the NHS. There’s no known cure for CP yet, but occasionally the drones wake up on the other side of their beds and “see the light”.

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    • Common Purpose – teaching idiots to think they are important. Then dropping those idiots into important jobs where they promptly screw the whole organisation up.

      Trouble is, the idiots then employ more idiots and the whole thing snowballs from there.

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  5. Seen this behavior from ‘health professionals’ first hand when a ‘Health visitor’ tried to bull past me on my own doorstep demanding to see a baby we didn’t have. The Clipboard wielding idiot didn’t even have the right address.

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    • I’d have let them in, told them the baby must have crawled under the floorboards again and he’d come out when he was hungry.

      Then tell an entirely different story when the police arrived 😉

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  6. I have endured people close to me expiring in the NHS, once because of lamentable care. Yet I have seen terrific care and efficient running of wards, in the same hospital, on a different ward. From my work in the world of business IT I realise something is wrong in the NHS hospitals, but what ? Thinking back to my trainee accounting days, a non-profit organistion made an income and expenditure statement. A profit making organistion made a statement of accounts. The former was to show income and spending, the latter had profits – income from sales over cost of sales. Somehow in the public sector the two statements have been confused, a non profit organisation has to show sales, a bit like the renaming of patients as customers that became in vogue in the Blair years

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    • The admin now tries to run the NHS as a business – so all this talk of ‘they’ll privatise the NHS’ is rubbish. Blair already did it. It’s run as a business but with endless money grabbed from taxpayers. That was a recipe for disaster.

      Which is what we have now.

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  7. To be honest, what you’re describing there sounds a lot like how we here tend to treat computer users. A lot of these users haven’t really got a clue. Things like installing nVidia drivers onto a PC which has an ATI Radeon graphics card in it give you the clue; that and plugging the monitor into the motherboard instead of into the card. Basic, utter cluelessness.

    In such circumstances, you tend to become paternalistic. Overbearing, even, and it is a very easy trap to fall into, especially as deliberately routing the users down a set pathway tends to reduce the support load markedly. For Ubuntu Linux users, I simply use a security hardening script that I wrote these days these days; copy script to machine and run as root and the thing sits there, chugs away and does the donkey-work of rectifying poor decisions. Tricks like correcting the PC clock, installing NTP to keep it correct, turning on the firewall and disabling the guest account, and turning on automatic security updates. Run the script and the PC is secure, stays patched and doesn’t generate support calls.

    In the NHS, what they’re doing is trying to build a scripted system much as I have done.

    So, take one pregnant woman. Enrole in pre-natal classes, monitor up to birth, then monitor child after birth. Ensure that child had had the standard set of tests done, so the next series of decision break-points in the script have the information needed to function correctly.

    What you’re seeing here is EXACTLY the same as Leggy has earlier described with regards cleaning and hygiene in shops; the rules and procedures are there because they have been designed by experts to guide complete idiots in how to do the work. The idiots do not know why they’re following the rules because they’re idiots and would fall asleep were the rules explained line by line.

    In the case described, the parents are idiots and so are the NHS staff. The NHS staff were incentivised by the tried and trusted carrot and stick method to keep to the script, and to get each set of tests done inside the prescribed times, to keep the NHS machine functioning correctly. But, the script also has another, parallel one which simply says “If the parents refuse access to the child, then follow subroutine Child_Protection()”, and also call subroutines _social_Worker() and police_family_liason_unit().

    Remember, this is a script designed by very clever people to ensure that children get looked after, working on the assumption that the people following the script are lazy idiots.

    The same script will operate where vaccinations are concerned. People are idiots, and people tend to believe other noisy idiots, like Andrew Wakefield the autism/vaccines moron. Reduce the percentage of vaccinations, and you get trouble with completely preventable epidemics. These preventable epidemics cause the NHS trouble, so there is a very strong impetus to prevent them by doing everything possible to force idiots to comply and get their kids vaccinated. This is another case where the experts really do know best.

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