Religion and the Tobacco Template

Fear not, God-fearers, I am not about to blame you for the persecution of smokers, drinkers, those with unapproved body shapes nor indeed anything else. I know the tobacco template had nothing to do with religion. It was the Righteous who did all that and their only religion is control.

No, I come not to blame but to warn. Yes, this miserable(?) sinner is to alert you to the dragon coming your way.

Where did you lot get the idea that sinners were miserable anyway? If it made us miserable we wouldn’t do it. Didn’t you ever think of that? I’m currently at the stage where I won’t be legal to drive for a week and have a little fire smouldering in my face. I’m not Pat Condell, I don’t ‘deny the holy spirit’. I’m drinking a bottle of what I consider to be holy spirit right now. In a sense, I’m worse than him. I don’t care about the holy spirit at all.

Okay. By now those who wouldn’t have listened anyway have clicked away from this page and probably unfollowed me on Twitter too. Good. No point talking to those who don’t want to listen. To the one who’s left, hear this.

This is not about linking the tobacco control template to religion. This is about the imminent application of that template to religion.

Yes, you heard right. Look around you. How much news coverage does the charity work of any religion get? Zilch. How much coverage do the extremists of any religion get? All of it. Lately the news is full of ‘Jihadi John’ and his British life. Who the hell cares where he comes from? Shoot the bastard and be done with it. I don’t even care what religion he is – he’s a serial killer, incurable, wipe him out.

But let’s chill a moment. Calm down, relax, drink and smoke awhile.

Then look again. Politicians say that ISIS has nothing to do with Islam when it clearly is all about Islam. Even other Islamic countries recognise that and want this super-extreme band of maniacs wiped out. Even Saudi Arabia, one of the strictest Muslim countries, don’t want ISIS around. Yet they do recognise that it is based on a combination of an extreme interpretation of Islam and the desire to be as viciously deranged as subhumanly possible. Saudi is building a wall to keep these buggers out. It’s true that Saudi metes out the same barbaric punishments but at least in Saudi, you get a trial first. You also have to go to Saudi to be subject to their laws. They don’t seek to apply their laws to you.

For the Righteous (who follow no god but themselves), ISIS serve a purpose. They make Islam as a whole appear utterly insane. More – they make religion appear utterly insane. All forms of religion. Even Christianity. I mean, come on, have you met Church of England types? You know they hate you when they give you weak tea. Compare the press coverage for the one-family loons of the Westboro Baptist Church with the press coverage of any other church anywhere. Remember too, every other church has far more members.

It all makes religion look like a bad thing. Like smoking is a bad thing. Drinking is a bad thing. Not fitting the Standard British Human body shape is a bad thing. It’s how they all started.

I have no religion. None. I am an apathist. There might or might not be a God or gods, I don’t care. I also don’t care if someone believes absolutely in their own personal God. It does not affect me one bit. I regard second-hand religion in the same way I regard second-hand smoke. Bunk.

Okay, if you’re the wrong religion in certain (mostly Muslim, let’s not sugar-coat it) countries, then second hand religion can kill you in a way that second hand smoke won’t. But that is all part of the plan.

Second hand smoke, second hand drinking, second hand obesity, these have all been promoted as real things and now second hand religion is a phrase waiting to be coined – but not yet. Not just yet. This year, you’ll hear it, I bet.

The stirring up of anti-religion is at its peak. It’s time to ban advertising of religion. Follow the template.

When I was small, my favourite and best-cherished toy car was a JPS black racing car. Covered in smoking ads. If I still had it, it would probably be worth a bit of cash now. Smoking advertising was banned except for racing, until that loophole was plugged.

I can’t remember if I sold my N gauge whisky grain wagons during my desperate times. I’d have to root through the still-substantial collection to be sure. I definitely took photos so they can be remade. I also once had an OO-gauge Guinness tank wagon. I bought it as a child. Bet they can’t now.

Plain packaging for cigs is on the way, then for booze and then for food and eventually for religion. It’s some time in the future for religion but it is coming. One World Religion, as some have said, and it will not be Islam. It will not be Christianity. It will not be Sikh or Buddhist or Jain or Pagan or any religion you can name now.

I think I might have happened upon the name of it but it will be otherwise, and more correctly, known as Control. That is what they want. It’s not about money, that hasn’t been a real thing for a long time. What they want is control. Total control.

The template starts here, religion. All religions. Believing in God makes you think you are safe and that is dangerous.

Within six months or less – belief in any God costs the NHS money.

Scoff at the prospect all you want. Smokers did, once…

45 thoughts on “Religion and the Tobacco Template

  1. I worship The Moon. At least you can see it. And it frequently looks as though everybody on it smokes.
    PS. If booze goes to plain cover, how will we know what we are drinking? But will it matter? Anything alcoholic is fine by me.


  2. Religion… We used to have the God slot on a Sunday teatime. Hymns and stuff in a packed Kirk. It still happens but it seems to be more of a moveable feast now. It has to be because there is sport, 30 odd mostly large sweaty chaps with oddly shaped balls at the moment.

    But then after that we have the real religious programmes. Global warming. An hour of supposed farm and country stuff with an ever increasing cast of converts who must repent. We have many of them here in Edinburgh. I live in a sane street between two greenie areas. These areas are full to the brim of leftie, greenie zealots. There are also some pretty tasty cars and the odd bicycle, which is strange given that cars are bad and untrained cycling is a proven killer. They like a bit of alcohol. They aren’t keen on polution but are very keen that we get an almost blanket 20 mph speed limit in Edinburgh. They don’t join up the dots which show polution will go through the roof.

    No matter. It will be their world soon enough I’d imagine. There is a mystery in all of this. How do they get to use their favourite, illegal high without smoking? The odd puff? An electro version?

    I’ll end by sharing their latest wheeze. We now have a Jobby Lobby. The lefties see far too many dog turds being left on the local pavements. Strangely the worst of it is in both of the areas I’ve mentioned. In Aberdeen you’ll have the Collie Tollie?


      • In the Brave New World there will be no friends. Friends are dangerous. They discuss things best left to Controllers.

        That’s why we are being urged to distrust everyone, and kids are being taught that in schools.


    • The world got a lot lonelier when they stopped us smoking those 15 fags in pubs and cafes. And as of next Monday everybody who smokes Cannabis will have to chose between continuing to drive to work and the one remaining pleasure in their lives. Prepare for a big increase in suicides. Also, if the Cannabis industry is destroyed by this new law, prepare for all the crooks who made a living from it find new, less pleasant ways to make a living. I fear that combined with a million unemployable people sanctioned into homelessness and poverty, and an unending tide of equally unemployable foreigners turning up, this summer could be extremely unpleasant for a lot of people.


  3. These politicians are dissembling scumbags. Without Islam there would be no ISIS. It’s a very clear cause and effect. As for Saudi Arabia, it’s all selfishness as the ISIS lunatics want to depose, which means kill, the royal family. I wonder if that will mobilise the Americans to confront ISIS on the ground to protect the evil bastards in power in Saudi Arabia?


      • Said this for a long time. I also do not think it would be pushing the conspiracy theory boat out TOO far to link their influence with the Dictatorships rabid anti alcohol and tobacco stance either.


  4. There may be no ‘God’; but, until they can explain the 95% of the Universe that is ‘Dark Matter/Energy’, I am going to hedge my bets.

    T’is said that Evolution dis-proves God; but, uutil they can show how ‘the
    force of Gravity’ or the Speed of Light have evolved, I will hedge my bets.


    • Actually, evolution does not disprove God. All it disproves is the idea that the world is only 6000 years old. Any God worth his salt would realise that his creation would change over time and factor-in an ability to adapt in his life forms.

      The 6000 years hinges on Adam’s age – and since he was immortal in Eden, he would not have been counting years until he was banned. How long was he in there?


  5. Never saw much point in worrying about a God, if there is any afterlife it will be a pleasant? surprise, if not you won’t know anything about it


  6. From Leo Strauss’s wikipedia entry. Reminded me immediately of your blog LI and is quite apt for this latest entry:

    “…….medieval political philosophers, no less than their ancient counterparts, carefully adapted their wording to the dominant moral views of their time, lest their writings be condemned as heretical or unjust, not by “the many” (who did not read), but by those “few” whom the many regarded as the most RIGHTEOUS (my emphasis) guardians of morality. It was precisely these RIGHTEOUS personalities who would be most inclined to persecute/ostracize anyone who was in the business of exposing the noble or great lie upon which the authority of the few over the many stands or falls.”

    The fookers have been at it a while it would seem.


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