Interesting times

My little car has been through its MOT and now has brakes and a boot lid that opens. Cost was painful but not crippling. I didn’t know a non-functioning boot was an MOT fail but apparently it is. Still it was only £30 for a new lock. If I’d known that I’d have fixed it myself.

I did fix it once before. It’s not hard to do. I did it with a scrapyard part and it wasn’t long before it broke again. If only I had known the new part was that cheap.

It’s a Ford, and every time you look up how to fix something on the internet you can find the answer. Usually under ‘this is a common problem’. Fords do seem to have a lot of ‘common problems’. I never had this with the Skoda.

It wasn’t a real Skoda. It was a Skoda Felicia after Volkswagen took over. As my boss at the time said, it was really a Volkswagen Polo with the street cred taken out.

Anyway, I am legally mobile again.

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Work has a new cleaner. Boss told me he has the same name as me and I insisted on being the one to tell the bakers and the cafe staff. The looks on their faces when I told them there was another me starting… priceless!

He’s a pleasant guy. Nice to everyone. Still, his training has begun. I don’t even need to make up a name for him. Two of us with the same name is going to cause more confusion than anything I could dream up.

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The other day, I told Obelix that he looks like Mongo from Blazing Saddles. Judging by the resulting reaction, he was the only one in the staff room who hasn’t seen that film. If he ever does, I might need medical attention.

He has threatened to kill me a few times. Four of them tonight. I told him Nads would be furious if he did because she wants to.

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There was a lizard funeral at work. Yeah, I know, you would expect no less. In the bottom of a box of bananas was a desiccated baby gecko. Poor little chap must have hatched in transit and found nothing to eat because lizards don’t eat bananas. Obelix, to his credit, arranged the funeral. It was most touching and there were few dry eyes at the final flush. Took a few goes. It seems dead geckos can swim.

Should I have mentioned that geckos lay eggs in pairs? I thought I’d save that information for later.

Someone pointed out that it could have been worse, there could have been a massive spider in the bananas. The guy who deals with fruit apparently hadn’t thought of that… He has now.

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I’ll gloss over the exploding arse incident in the customer toilets. Suffice to say that the manager in charge said ‘lock it and leave it’ and called the hazmat suit sanitisers – or as Obelix calls them, the poop scoop crew. He’s learning 🙂

Okay, I’m probably the most qualified person within 20 miles to deal with it but work liability insurance says no. If the manager told me to do it and I caught something, I’m not covered by work insurance but could put in a compensation claim I could retire on. Tonight’s manager was smart.

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Right, I feel a rant coming on. It’ll go on a timer for tomorrow…

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16 thoughts on “Interesting times

  1. There was once a time an MOT was a sign that your vehicle was safe for use on the road.

    Nowadays it is used as a lever to get people to change their cars, spend that hard earned cash on a method of transport that nags you and restricts you every time it can. Insisting on maintenance by expensive mechanics. Electric vehicles not requiring MOTs if I remember correctly.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Got my car MOT done Tuesday. There was a problem with emissions, but my mechanic ‘man’ knew what to do. Some de-coke fluid in the petrol tank then drive the car around for twenty minutes or so cleared out the gunge. Resubmitted while the engine was still warm – problem solved. You cannot beat having a good ‘man’.

    Liked by 1 person

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