The last time I watched real TV there were five channels and SCART was the new big thing. I looked at TVs recently and it’s all USB and HDMI and fuck off you archaic troll. I have no idea what I’m looking at now.
But there was a hoover. Two, actually. I had two crappy second hand hoovers and finally bought a new one. In Lidl, I got the last one for £35 and it’s a beast. It can suck up water too. It looks like this…
Okay, the top part isn’t original equipment but I had a spare Dalek head lying around as I’m sure everyone does.
Anyway, back to the hoover/TV link.
I had two crappy but still working hoovers, too good to throw away but not good enough to sell. I have a mate who works in a charity shop so I thought if they can get them going properly they can make a few quid. I took them round.
At this point there is a chair involved but trust me, it gets back to television later.
Someone had donated an office chair. A very nice black faux leather one with deep padding. The sort of chair you sit in while stroking a cat and saying ‘So, Mr. Bond, this time you are fucked’.
It didn’t have the fire safety tag so they couldn’t sell it to me (damn!) but my friend, as staff, could take it away for a tiny donation.
So he said ‘Are you around when I finish work at 3?’ and I said ‘No, I start work at 3’.
We decided the best option was to put the chair in my car and I’d take it to his house after work.
So that’s what happened.
At his house after 9 pm I delivered the chair in exchange for a coffee and a look at TV. He had his on as always, tuned to the Horror Channel that shows scary films. I had no idea this channel existed.
I have decided to get a TV. Might not be immediate but there is a horror channel…