No, you don’t just need a slingshot and the power of God behind you. Although the slingshot can be a good starting point.
I recently made the old game ‘Doom’ work on an old Windows XP computer. Not the earliest DOS ones, this was ‘Ultimate Doom’, a later but still mainly DOS version with ‘slightly’ better graphics. Okay, not up to the absolute latest versions but the old graphics card in that machine will never run those.
I find that game relaxing. Nobody is on your side. If it moves it wants to kill you and some things that don’t move will try to kill you too. It’s simple. Shoot everything and don’t die.
It’s even more relaxing if you know how to apply the invulnerability cheat 😉
The game has a lot of different kinds of monsters and if you’re faced with a room full of different kinds, there’s no need to shoot. Just run through them (don’t get stuck) and out of another door. They will fire directly at you – even if another monster is in the way. The hit monsters will retaliate against the one who shot him.
Basically, you start a bar brawl then dodge out of the way until there are just a few left standing. Those left standing are already damaged and easy to pick off.
So yes, all you need is a slingshot. If none of the monsters notice you, hit one with a rock and it’ll start firing. That will set off an escalation of violence and you’re safely out of the way while it happens.
In real life, it’s safer to find a useful idiot to start the fighting but the principle holds true.
It’s the step between ‘divide’ and ‘conquer’. If you divide an army into smaller groups, you still have to fight all the groups one by one. Isn’t it so much easier to divide a nation into segments and get those segments to wipe each other out?
The last one standing will be so damaged you can take them out with a few stern words. Even better, as William of Orange found when James II made a royal fuck-up of running England, they might even ask you to intervene.
Is it hard to cause division followed by strife? Ha! It’s a doddle. We all know long-time friends who no longer speak to each other over some trivial argument. We all know someone who likes to spread rumours and then sit back and watch people fight about the tales they’ve told.
Scaling that up is much easier than you’d think. The current political system in almost every country makes this child’s play. Whatever one side wants, the other opposes it. Even if they secretly agree with it. The division is there, you just have to tip it into violence. The left like to use violence so they’re always the side to choose to provoke. The Right are too cynical. The Left believe pretty much anything.
So what you need is the left to have the upper hand for a while and then make them feel like they’re losing everything.
It needed Tiny Blur. Charismatic and not too far left so the more stable will vote for him. Enough teeth to make a dentist’s eyes fill with money signs and yet not too large as to scare a voter. Replace Iron Knickers with Monochrome Man and anyone is more interesting. Steve Davis could have won that one.
The manipulations behind the scenes aren’t really hard to see. They think we’re all stupid so they don’t hide all that well.
You see, if we had let the UK continue under Thatcherite policies there would have been grumblings and mumblings and occasional riots but no uprising. No war. The Left had no power so weren’t losing anything. The right without power won’t rise up. They have jobs and real lives and everything and don’t all work for government so they pay taxes, not sponge off them. You need to get the Left to lose and lose big so they turn violent.
What do you give someone with nothing to lose? Something to lose.
Then make sure they lose it. Fast and unexpectedly.
Brexit – the country voted, the losing side turned nasty. America – the country voted, the losing side turned very nasty. It gets nastier every time.
And sillier. Superbowl – the Patriots won, the other side’s fans actually took to the streets to protest! Seriously? Protesting the result of a fucking football game? Oh, how easy is it going to get?
What’s next? Riots because the wrong player won Wimbledon or News at Ten started five minutes late? Well… More likely riots if Jeremy Kyle retired or the wrong character gets the pub in EastEnders.
Oh it gets better. Tessie May rushed to be first to visit Donnie Darko (wait, no, Donnie Trumpton) on becoming King of the Seven Planets (no, wait, Emperor of the American Empire) then Gimli the Speaker of the House of Morons says Donnie can’t visit Moria (no, wait, Parliament).
‘He’ll taste the edge of my axe if he shows up here’ is one made-up quote attributed to Gimli. As is ‘No, no, not the beard!’ and ‘Tallness is an abomination and should be illegal’.
So we have the Prime Monster sensibly keeping well in with the country with the biggest army and nuclear arsenal and the idiot Speaker trying to wreck relations with the country that might be our biggest trading partner once we are free of the EU.
Didn’t Tiny Blur rush to be first to congratulate Barry O’Blimey on becoming Dark Lord of the Yankee Horde? How is that so different? Oh, I see, Barry was a Leftie king. Donnie is a Rightie king. We live in a world where left is right and right is wrong. It all makes sense now.
It’s as bad as the confusion I experienced when moving between Wales and Scotland during my PhD. It was the beer that confused me.
In Cardiff there is Brains’ Beers. It was originally Brian’s Beers but the signwriter had enjoyed some free samples and well, they’d paid for the sign so they let it go.
Anyway. There were several beers in their range at the time. I preferred SA, we never knew what it really stood for but we called it Skull Attack for reasons you can probably guess.
There was Light, which was a pale bitter beer of low strength so you could have one or two at lunchtime and still function, and there was Dark, a dark coloured beer of a similar colour to Guinness but nowhere near as solid in your stomach.
In Scotland, McEwan’s also had dark beer and light beer but their classification was based on the specific gravity of the beer, not the colour. So the dark coloured beer was ‘Light’ and the amber coloured one was ‘Heavy’.
Dark is light and light is heavy. Try working that one out after you’ve clocked up a few hours in the pub.
It’s no real surprise then to find that now, left is right and right is wrong. The world has been screwed up for a long time.
Back to the game. Not the computer game, the real one. What’s our diminutive David doing to poor Goliath at the moment?
Well. The recent Paris attack was reported by the BBC and the report said, not once but several times, the machete man shouted “All of you, at the bar!” and took pains to point out this means God is Grapes in Arabic. They used to take the same amount of effort to avoid saying that.
The UN let a spokesman admit, very clearly, that the whole Global Warming scam was intended to change the world economic system, destroy capitalism and ultimately massively reduce the world’s population. Admit it why? Now? When everyone is already angry?
France is likely to have to choose between a far left and a far Right candidate for president. The Left one wants to let even more car-burning and shopper-shooting immigrants into France, the Right one wants to stop that. Put aside your indoctrination for a moment and imagine it’s you parking a car in France and going to the shops. Who would you pick?
Russia and America. The countries that could be sniffing each others’ arses like dogs while China wipes us all out (reminds me of the Brian Aldiss tale ‘All The World’s Tears’) and tow big bosses at the end of the video game.
In one of the ‘Doom’ variants you come up against a cyberdemon and a queen spider. It’s easy. Both are really hard to kill so run between them and then hide. They both start firing and they’ll hit each other.
Wait for one of the superpowers to wipe out the other and the last one left is weakened to the point where it’s easy.
The people are getting angry and the coals are being added to the fire daily. This boiler is under pressure. There’s no release valve. There can be only one outcome and it’s the one that was always intended.
So where are we? Russia. America. Love/hate/no-trust. What’s left of the rapidly collapsing EU. A pressure for a communist style future. Population control. Suppression of all those annoying riots and terrorists.
Where is the saviour? Who will fight off the now-revealed enemies? Revealed all at once as a shock tactic to get a reaction. Who will save us from our own terrible excesses? Who has been big and quiet through it all?
Where is the modern William of Orange?
Mae win ti
But… they aren’t doing it. They are puppets too.