It’s been a very long time since I last made a model aeroplane. I made them as a youngster, lots of them. I made them for my son until he grew old enough to make them himself – and his interests tended more towards helicopters than aeroplanes. As for me, I always had a soft spot for the weird designs.
Oh I made Concorde when I was about eight (a disappointing kit – hardly any parts!) and I made airliners and of course Spitfires and Hurricanes and Mustangs and Kittyhawks, along with Me109 and FW-190 for them to fight with.
Then I discovered the Dornier stable. Holy crap. I couldn’t believe anyone even tried to fly some of those monstrosities. Weird planes became The Thing. And yet that phase faded away about forty years ago, apart from a brief revival when my son was little. I don’t think I’ve made a model plane in the last 20 years, probably more.
Railways, trucks, ships… those were my main staples. Ships especially. The kits are expensive but they take months to finish so you get your money’s worth. The only trouble is finding somewhere to put the damn things afterwards. They’re not as easy to give away as you’d think. The thing about models is… the fun is in making them. Apart from the motorised ones such as trains, the static model building fun is in going that extra mile. Adding brake pipes to trucks and so on. Once the model is finished it’s just in the way.
Back to somewhere near the point. One thing I had a model of in my early teens was a Messerschmidt. Well, several. In fact one is still around here somewhere – the Me262 I painted up to look like the cover of Blue Oystercult’s ‘Secret Treaties’ album. The odd one though, was the Me 163, also called ‘Komet’. I saw a kit recently, cheap, so I thought I’d see if I still have it in me as an aeromodeller.
This is a particularly odd one. Second world war German interceptor/fighter with a few twists. See those wheels under it? It ditched those on takeoff. It didn’t retract them. It retracted that ski they’re sitting on when in flight. Landing, the pilot had that ski and the tail wheel and that was it. Falling over was a real issue.
The model will get a tiny silver propeller on the front end. That’s not what drove it, I think it was a speed measuring thing. What drove this was a rocket engine. Not a jet. A rocket.
Powered by hydrogen peroxide.
Oh yes. Fly this and you are sitting on a bomb. Land with any fuel in your tanks (they were meant to glide in to land) and there’s a good chance of boom. The slightest spark when fuelling, another good chance of boom. And hydrogen peroxide in rocket fuel form, well, a good chance of boom just because it feels like it.
I think, if I had been a German pilot in one of these, I’d have been glad of the brown seat if i saw any tracer flying around.
Anyway, it’s a fun little kit. I found my paint collection wasn’t really aeroplane friendly these days so, thanks to CStM, the blue underside is nail polish. Actually it works rather well but you can’t hang around – it dries fast.
Something was bothering me though, something about the decals supplied. Oh there were the Luftwaffe wing crosses and the little warning signs and so on but there were a few odd ones too. Have a look…
The ones marked ‘4’ are the ones that confused me. I knew the WWII German Wehrmacht and especially SS divisions used runes on their vehicles because I used to play wargaming using actual models as a teenager – but I couldn’t recall ever seeing them on aeroplanes Also they don’t look like any rune I recognise. It took a while to work it out.
Decal 4 goes on the tail, as per instruction sheet…
Yes, they give British markings even though we didn’t have any and nobody paints the underside of a plane orange. Maybe we captured some when we smacked Merkel’s ancestors’ arses but I never heard of us trying to fly any of them. I suspect any British pilot would take one look and say ‘Fark arf, I’ll take a week in the brig before I sit on top of that farking firework’. That, however, is just the start of the political correctness. Look again at that tail image. See the white triangle? It was never there.
Now take a look at something I didn’t notice on the box cover until later. Look at what’s on the tail.
If you ever made German warplane models as a kid, you know what the insignia on the tail is. They all had it. It’s part of history. It was real, it happened, accurate history demands accuracy.
It’s a swastika. Decal 4 is half-swastikas. All the planes had them because Germany at that time was run by real Nazis, led by the original Literally Hitler.
Yes. A symbol with unpleasant connotations – but as kids, in the 60s and 70s, our parents and grandparents had no problem with us seeing those symbols. They told us what they meant, and how to avoid it happening again. Young kids making this model now will not know that it’s two halves of a symbol. They won’t know how to finish the model with historical accuracy.
So when the next swastika wielding yobs arise, our children and grandchildren will not recognise what they are. Is that intentional?
Or have we become so weak that we cannot accept a thing from the past because it’s just too scary? Really? Will we ban Tyrannosaurus Rex models because they’re scary even though they were dead before any of our ancestors were born? You know, I wouldn’t be at all surprised.
The Church of Climatology insist we must Save Humanity (which involves giving them money and Unquestioning Belief or the world will end, but it’s not a religion) and I say…
What the fuck use are the modern human race? They’re just going to whine themselves into extinction anyway. So the world warms up and CO2 increases. The world will have jungles again. All the forests we cleared will grow back, We just won’t be here to see it and complain about it. Let the fuckers die. If that is the future of humanity, so scared of a symbol that they can’t even face it even though it’s from almost 80 years ago, let them die out. They are only getting worse.
If the dinosaurs were wiped out by an asteroid, they went with a bang. A future Cockroach Society will remember our species as the one that went out with a whimper and a plea for more benefits.
I should mention that during one of my dinner table rants, my son said ‘If everyone died tomorrow you’d complain they died in your way’ and he was right. They would. No damn consideration, that’s the trouble with people nowadays.
Oh I expect to get some rage back for this and I fully expect it to come from the same place as ‘all white people must die’. I’m not racist. I’d kill you all if I had a button to do it. Somewhere I do have the 10 ohm 500 watt resistor to finish it, I’ll let you know when I find it. Oh wait – you’ll know.
When the human race is over, nobody won but everyone gets a prize. That is where it is headed. Can we turn it back? Can we get back to sense and reality? Well, we have 57 varieties of gender now. We have people insisting that the word ‘negro’ on Spanish (it means black) must be changed because it is racist. If I was Spain I would change it to ‘arsebasket’ or ‘jizzmonkey’ or best of all, ‘progessive-liberal-fuckwit’.
Honestly. Languages the SJWs don’t even speak have to change to fit their agenda. While they insist illegal Mexican immigrants to the USA are respected. Who speak – gasp – Spanish!
California (where else?) wants to declare caffeine a carcinogen while demanding unclean water to drink.
Then they will tell you about the seven million deadly chemicals in your latte then declare caffeine an addiction. See where it goes from here? Smokers do. You shat on us and loved it. Have fun with the same shit now
You know, one thing about history is that it stops us doing the same stupid things again. Like drinking untreated water. But, who would be so stupid? Oh. Californians.
Most of California is trying to be a separate state. I have never set foot in the USA but I can see their point.
You know, all this hate, all this division, it’s been done before. Most recently under the swastika the progressives claim to hate. Now you don’t get a decal, you get a dare. Will you do it?
I remember the tales of what Nazi actaully means,