More official lunacy

Book stuff first. My mother is visiting in early April so I’m going to be occupied with getting book stuff sorted quickly. I have an alternative-history novel to get ready and the Spring anthology too. Expect to see contracts and payments going out long before the deadline for that (March 31st) so I can be ready to load it up in the first week of April. I’m not going to move the deadline forward, that would be unfair, but I won’t have as much leeway on that as I usually do.

Right. That’s done. On with the actual post.

The idiots in charge have decided to spend like drunken sailors again, this time on an ‘emergency alert system‘ that will set off every mobile phone with a ten minute siren and disable any other use of that phone until the user presses ‘ok’ or ‘I give up’ or ‘scare me harder daddy’ or whatever they choose to put on that button.

We’ve never needed this before. It’s the UK. The rainy island off the edge off Europe. We don’t really need to worry about forest wildfires because our forests rarely get dry enough to burn, and the Green Men have cut most of them down for windmills anyway. We sometimes get little earthquakes that would barely be noticed in most other countries. We have no volcanoes. Not even dormant ones. We do not have rampaging predators nor do we have stampedes of wildebeest. The worst we get in that respect is deer with no road sense.

Let’s face it. Bugger all happens here most of the time. There are occasional storms that cause damage but we don’t need the phone to tell us when that’s happening. In fact in the last big one all the phones were dead, landline and mobile, so an alert would be as useless as it was superfluous.

It is a ridiculously pointless idea unless… the government is planning something big to scare us with. It wouldn’t be the first time. The ‘test’ is on 23rd April and it looks like turning off ’emergency alerts’ on your phone won’t stop it. Well I’m pretty bad at remembering to charge mine…

They are advertising it, sure, but not everyone will get the message. When phones turn into air raid sirens there will be people who don’t know it’s coming. Some will have dodgy hearts or high blood pressure and some will be driving. There will be crashes and heart attacks and people trying to find out what’s happening using a phone that no longer works unless they tap the button they don’t know they need to tap. It is going to be a disaster.

But then, has any UK government since Cromwell done anything but cause disaster? And Cromwell turned out to be a dick too.

I’m not an anarchist, but I really am beginning to understand their point of view.

22 thoughts on “More official lunacy

  1. Stepping up the Putin Bad propaganda to missiles incoming level?

    Can’t think what else unless it’s to ensure when the WHO (twinned with WEF) officially takes over as world govt ”the message” for instant mass obedience.

    Whatever its for you can put money on it being for purposes other than those officially announced..

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Another thought on how eyewateringly stupid this is.
    How many peeps with phones have them on whilst driving?
    So all the phones are going to erupt with a scary siren that only stops when you take your eyes off the road & fumble for the phone in your jacket etc all whilst negotiating that roundabout or whizzing down the Awhatever at 70.
    Musta been a Covidian that came up with that one.

    Liked by 1 person

    • …and wouldn’t fumbling for your phone constitute ‘driving without due care and attention’ or summat?
      How many accidents will the Government cause?
      They haven’t thought this through, have they? Those pesky unintended consequences.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Your Country Needs Lerts – Longrider

  4. “I’m not an anarchist, but I really am beginning to understand their point of view.”

    I’m having more and more positive thoughts about pikeys. They tell the State to ‘F*ck off’ and dare them to do anything about it. And the State shows itself to be a pussy when confronted with the threat of concerted violence. It shows how weak it really is – the police won’t touch them, nor any other State bodies, HMRC, DVLA, councils, Environment Agency etc etc. They all just look the other way. It shows how powerless the State would really be if we the people stood together in the way the pikeys do.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. We have an Emergency Alert system here in New Zealand ,but we live on top of two tectonic plates and there are numerous rumblings going on all the time. I am not worried about earthquakes ,but living by the sea,a Tsunami warning is very welcome.
    We recently had a nationwide test and it took a while to remember what the noise was all about.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I can see its use and importance in places like yours… but the UK’s earthquakes are best called ‘tremors’, we have no volcanoes and away from the coasts it’s a bit too high to worry about tsunamis. We don’t get massive wildfires like Australia or America, the country’s pretty wet and the Greens have cut down most of the forests to save the planet.
      With our weather folk panicking over a layer of snow that looks like someone dropped a box of talcum powder in recent years, I’d expect this alarm to go off the moment the first flake hits the ground. It’s going to be very silly.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Here’s an idea for its real purpose . . . flushing out the phones being held secretly in British jails.

    Nah. That’s silly.

    Besides – a number of those inmates will be way ahead of the plan. We should learn from them.


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