Size matters

Today is 370 years since the opening paragraph of Jessica’s Trap. That story started on April 30th, 1647, the eve of Beltane. I have to find out what’s going on with that book, the contract with the publisher expired over a year ago and I’m still not sure whether it’s been taken off sale. Sometimes it’s there, sometimes not. It’s going to come back under Leg Iron Books.

But to get to the point, this one is about sugar. Specifically, the sneaky lies around the subject. Also about the bollocks we get now, in general.

Today the Daily Fibber states that some ready meals have more sugar than a doughnut. Do they mean pro-rata? No, they mean in absolute terms. Basically, they are saying that you are better to feed your kids a single doughnut for lunch rather than a pasta bake or a curry with rice.

Among the worst culprits is Kirsty’s Kids’ Kitchen Chicken Korma With Brown Rice. It is promoted as a ‘nutritionally balanced’ meal with ‘no added sugar’.

But the small print reveals it has a total sugar content of 14.8g, almost four teaspoons, more than twice the 6.2g found in a McDonald’s Sugar Donut.

If you were to compare the sugar content as sugar per 100g of product, the doughnut would win hands down. If you were to compare actual nutritional content, the curry would win every time. However, that does not allow you to pretend that all ready meal companies are subsidiaries of Big Sugar, charged with shifting as much of the stuff into kids as possible.

The whole article is utter bollocks, but then it is the Daily Mail so we’re used to that. Even so, this kind of shit is what politicians believe, because they have no minds of their own and have to have signs on their headboards so they can find their way out of bed in the mornings.

Honey, fruit juices and agave syrup are high in sugar but are not labelled as such.

That’s because they are made of sugar. I wouldn’t expect to see ‘high in sugar’ on a bag of Tate and Lyle’s best granulated sucrose. I fully expect that bag to contain 100% sugar.

It is claimed that we eat more sugar than we used to. I don’t think that’s true at all. Sugar sandwiches were a staple of my youth. Pancakes were coated in golden syrup and sugar. Syrup on toast was a favourite. Sugar mice were mouse shaped blocks of sugar with a hint of food colouring and a bit of string for a tail. You can still get them – a sweet shop in a nearby town sells them.

Yes, a sweet shop. It’s called ‘The sweet shop’. They sell sweets. Nothing else. Just sweets – including ice cream in cones that have been dipped in chocolate and sugar sprinkles. It’s the anti-sugar brigade’s equivalent of a tobacconist or an off-licence. I’m sure they get palpitations even knowing it exists. They’ll go into full meltdown if they find out that, just along the road, is another shop called ‘The chocolate bar’ which sells only chocolate. You wouldn’t burn the calories in a single cube of chocolate fudge by walking between those two shops – and there’s a pub in between in case you get peckish on the way.

There were many sweet shops when I was a kid. All within easy reach of school. We didn’t get fat – well some kids did but really, only a few. Like now. Look at the feral little groin-fruit scampering out when school closes. There are a few fat ones, some chubby ones (who will lose it all when they hit the growth spurt of puberty) and a lot of scrawny little urchins.

They are probably, on average, a bit heavier than my generation but we didn’t have computers and Xboxes, we did most of our playing outside. Then again, we did have Scalextric and train sets and toy cars and soldiers and a lot of really good board games so we did a lot of sitting around too. Especially in lousy weather, which we get a lot of in the UK.

People have been getting larger as generations progress. Look at those antique dining chairs. They are far too small to be useful now. So this generation being a tad larger and heavier than my generation is not an anomaly. It’s normal.

If modern kids are getting fatter it has nothing to do with sugar. It has more to do with mollycoddling. They aren’t allowed to climb trees. They can’t wander off in the woods in case Gary’s Gang is lurking. Even the toys are no fun any more.

I had a chemistry set. It included magnesium ribbon among other dangerous things. Of course I burnt the magnesium. Who wouldn’t?

I bought my son a chemistry set when he was young. It was the most boring, God-awful waste of time I have ever seen. It had safety glasses! Mine didn’t have those. Safety glasses in a set that was based entirely on the safest experiments you can imagine. Growing copper sulphate crystals is fun the first time but the novelty soon wears off. Where’s the stuff that burns and/or goes bang? Not in the set? Then what the hell are the safety glasses for? He wasn’t much interested and when I looked it over, I saw no reason to push it.

Plastic test tubes and pipettes. I had glass ones. I bought more in the local chemist. I learned how to draw out a pipette into a flexible capillary long before getting chemistry lessons in school. I think I still have a piece of one in my thumb. It only twinges occasionally as a reminder not to do it again.

That set would never kindle anyone’s interest in science. It makes it look extraordinarily tedious.

All this dumbing down in the name of ‘the cheeldren’ is too easy to laugh at. It’s really very dangerous. Making children super-slim means they have no energy reserves for that massive growth spurt at puberty. A lot of us looked like bean bags at 11 years old and like panel pins at 14. No intervention was necessary. It was nature.

I’m still wondering whether the introduction of spectacles when I had blurry distance vision at 11 was a bad idea. I was in that growth spurt time. Things were changing and not all at once. My eyes might have been short-sighted because the eye sockets were growing at a different rate to the eyes in them. It might have corrected itself.

When (if) it did, it adjusted to give me correct vision without realising I had glass lenses in the way. Now I have to wear them – not all the time, only when I have to look at things.

My close-up vision has definitely deteriorated with age though. I could see things clearly less than 10 cm in front of my eyes which is why I could paint the eyes onto 1/72 scale figures. Can’t do that now without a magnifier, but that’s normal. My closest clear focus is now 25 cm without any lenses between.

Yet I wonder, would my long vision have corrected itself if my growing body wasn’t looking through those lenses? I suppose I’ll never know.

I used to laugh at the daft pronouncements and at the anenecephalic politicians who just lapped it all up. That was before I realised how deadly it actually was.

There are people claiming that vaping is as dangerous as smoking. It’s steam! I have seen, recently, claims that there is antifreeze in vape. No, antifreeze is ethylene glycol. Vape contains propylene glycol, a harmless food grade thickening agent found in yogurt and many other things. Including asthma inhalers, in case you want to jump up with ‘Breathing is not the same as eating’.

Smoking has risks. They are vastly overplayed, the risk to others is so comical I could never skip the chance to terrify an antismoker. But yes, there are risks. There were risks in my first chemistry set, my first airgun, my first forays (untrained) into meddling with electricity and explosives and I accepted the risk and did it anyway. That will never change for me. ‘Perfectly safe’ is no fun at all.

Perfectly safe is what the idiots in the pressure groups claim to want. What their aims will achieve is the extinction of the human race and in some cases, of all life on the planet.

Bill (wee fookin’ bawbag) Gates has stated that he wants to reduce atmospheric CO2 to zero. Really. Zero. I have thought up a way that it could be done but I will die before I tell a single soul. If atmospheric CO2 was zero, every single plant and alga on this planet is dead within days.

When they die, nothing is producing oxygen. We breathe oxygen, as do the rest of the animals around us. We exhale CO2. My device mops it all up.

The oxygen will run out. ‘Bye. Well, some anaerobic bacteria will be around so the planet can start again. Makes me wonder if that happened before…

That is Bill Gates, multi-millionaire who thinks money makes him clever. He’s not alone. George Soros thinks money makes him superior. So do the Virgin Beard Guy and the rich tart he’s funding (can’t be bothered looking them up, it’s late) to make us vote for what they want, not what we want. Politicians think they are superior because they have money even though they only have money because they extort it from the rest of us in taxes. They produce fuck all. No wonder they support benefit spongers. Kindred spirits.

They want to tax Electrofag. They have paid shills pretending it’s dangerous. Smoking is nowhere near as dangerous as they claim. By comparison, vaping is harmless. Well, mostly harmless. I mean, come on. If you believe breathing smoke is deadly then surely people breathing steam is a better thing?

All the politicians look for are tax opportunities. They would love to tax food and the fat, sugar and salt Puritans are glad to give them enough lies to let them do it. The general public…

…are mostly gullible idiots. I speak from personal experience. I have convinced people of utterly nonsensical things for fun. Tax the rich? They’ll vote for it without realising that as they have a job, they ARE the rich! The really rich don’t pay taxes, they collect them,

I digress, as usual.

Zero salt will kill you. Zero sugar will kill you faster. Zero smoking will kill ASH, which is why they pretend Big Tobacco controls Electrofag even though Electrofag would be the greatest thing ASH could hope for if they really wanted what they say they want.

Too much of anything will kill you too. Eat and drink and smoke whatever you want, if it starts to hurt, slow down.

Oh, I remember when you only saw doctors when you were ill and they fixed you without judging your life…

…and now you have to fit the standard. Be the right size or be shunned.


General chatter

Tomorrow I load up a book about Han Snel, the Dutch painter, onto Amazon. It has many pictures and won’t be cheap so I have tried to reduce page numbers to a minimum because they charge by the page for printing. I think this one would actually be better in a large format hardback. I’ll do that too. It’s in Dutch, although the author has hinted he’ll do a translation one day.

I have bought a chimney sweeping brush. I have never swept a chimney before but hell, it can’t be all that hard. I mean, what could possibly be up there? I intend to install a fireplace of sorts in the large and ancient fire-hole in the utility room. The one with the swivelling iron bar that used to hold a cauldron over the flames. I should get a cauldron…

We have a new author at Leg Iron Books. Margo Jackson’s ‘The Mark’ is imminent for publication, as soon as I have the Dutch book up. It’s about an innocent man whose life is ruined by coincidence and public suspicion – but is he innocent? It’s not that black and white. You’ll have to think a bit.

There is a plant in the garden I thought I recognised as it started growing. Ah, of course. It’s one I’ve wanted for a long time. Stinking Hellebore. It’s lovely. It’s growing next to the jawbone of something that I’ve left in place like the tree skull. Why mess with the garden ornaments when they suit me anyway?

My old Fiesta is still in the garage. I charged up the battery and it started first time. It hadn’t been touched for over three months so that’s not bad. I left it a few days and the battery is dead again. It’ll need a new battery and an MOT before it goes up for sale as well as some minor rust treatments. It’s a good car, it’s a shame to say goodbye to it but it’s not suited to the terrain around here. It really needs to go and live in a town now.

Well, tonight was just a ramble. I haven’t seen much of the news but I doubt it’s much different from yesterday. Soon I hope to review a new Electrofag. I haven’t tried one of the new style ones before, so that will be interesting. I still have many flavours of electrojuices here, it’ll be interesting to see if they work better with the new style ones.

Okay, I suppose I should sleep… not that there’s much gardening to do this weekend. Everything is still wet out there, it’s still too cold to plant anything and the grapevine in the greenhouse seems to be doing just fine without any help from me. Oh, there are strawberry plants in the greenhouse too. I could probably live here for ten years and still be finding things…


Are these really the best we have?

Politics. I don’t hate it. It’s a necessary evil.

Politicians. Why are they all clearly self-absorbed retards?

Look at the state of it all. Here we have a general election looming and what do we get? Gina Miller and Richard Branson openly trying to buy votes to get the result they want and nobody so much as raises an eyebrow. Even in those backwater shitholes, they at least try to hide the corruption. Here it’s in the newspapers and nothing happens. Nobody gets arrested or even told to watch their step. What the hell happened to integrity? Even Labour used to have some.

‘Labour’. What a joke that party has become. All of them career politicians living off the product of other people’s labour while never doing any themselves. People who work and pay taxes actually vote to be told what to do by people they are paying, and those people live lifestyles the workers who vote for them can only dream of.

‘Conservative’. Hahaha. They are the same, all career politicians who enact laws based on nonsense fed to them by Temperance puritans while their heads remain untarnished by the ravages of thought. Well, they think about money. Mostly how they can get more of ours without having to get their hands dirty in real work of any kind.

Lib Dem and SNP, well hardly worth mentioning. They have become comical in their childish insistence that they are great powers while dwindling rapidly into oblivion.

It doesn’t matter who wins this election. We will be governed by dickheads with no thought beyond getting more cash for themselves no matter who wins. Our choice is simply which colour of rosette our twat masters will wear.

There’s nothing left. Really. Nothing to choose. Place your vote next to Mong #1 or Mong #2, it no longer matters at all. If you’re lucky you can vote for a fish finger, if you’re really lucky you’ll get to vote for Anna Raccoon. Otherwise you’re going to vote for a dickhead. Parties no longer select candidates based on anything more than looks and avarice. That seems to be what voters want too.

Oh I could move to another country but it’s really no different anywhere. Even North Korea is only a logical extension of where every other country is heading. A fat twat with a 60’s bad Beatles haircut who dictates the minutiae of peoples’ lives and punishes dissent with death. Openly and blatantly pointless elections. People in total poverty while the elite live like royalty. That is the true face of the equality agenda.

North Korea is what those who bleat about ‘poverty’ in the West are leading us into. Western ‘poverty’ means you can’t afford Nikes and you shop at Primark instead of Marks and Spencer.

I’ve been poor, as in, no money and severe debt, but I wouldn’t say I was ever in real poverty. I was homeless once but I never had to drink out of muddy puddles. I went a day or so at a time without food but humans can do that. Most of all, I knew it wasn’t going to be permanent. I didn’t grow up with utterly nothing, knowing that was how it was likely to be for my entire life. So I have not experienced real poverty, and neither has anyone in the West – especially those on benefits.

Seriously. You are not in poverty if you are getting money for simply existing. Real poverty is not like that. There are many, many people, all over the world, who would dearly love to be in Western style poverty.

Yet we hear about ‘the poor’ even though, during my time as a janitor, I could have made more cash claiming benefits and sitting on my arse watching Jeremy Kyle and drinking Red Stripe all day. You’d have been paying. I didn’t do it. Instead I paid taxes on my meagre income so others could do it.

Every party on the ballot form will let that continue. Every one.

It’s not because they care. They don’t.  None of them care. It’s because helping the poor gets soundbites while taking away less of the money people actually work for doesn’t get a vote. At least, that’s what they think.

They think that way for the same reason they think hammering smokers, drivers, drinkers of booze and of sugary drinks, those who like a bit of fat and those who just want a quick microwave meal are all good ideas. They think that way because they are told to by the single-issue whiners who tell them how to think.

What we need is a leader who actually thinks, rather than the lazy-minded shits we have now who use the tax money they extort from us to pay cretins to come up with thoughts they can use.

What we need are actual adults in charge, not the schoolyard politics of ‘Oh, I think he’s bad so let’s get him, girls’ that is endemic now. It’s not just the UK. The USA has claims of Russia wanting a right wing government and the left think that makes sense. Barry O’Blimey has interfered in the French election as well as looking very suspiciously connected to the Leftie judges slapping down Donny Trumpton.

Donny isn’t blameless either. He has sacked people for not agreeing with him. Not quite up to the Kim Jong Jingly-Jangly way of silencing dissent but that’s how it starts. He wants a wall across the border too. Everyone wants a wall now. I blame China. They started it.

We have the Tiny Blur threatening a return to politics. Really? How much money can one man spend? Then again, UK dentistry charges on that set of teeth must be astronomical. You could carve names on those teeth and use them as grave markers.

Then there is Brexit. Tessie May has been out whining that all other EU countries are out to get us. Well why don’t we just fuck off out then? It’s what we voted for, it’s what the EU wants, where’s the problem? Oh right, they want us to pay to leave. That’ll be a ‘no’ then and we’ll trade with every other country on earth that isn’t in the EU. It’s not a hard decision, just do it.

So we won’t get any more BMWs or Audis. I drive a Toyota. That doesn’t come from the EU. We won’t be restricted to driving Austin Metros or Leyland Shitheaps.

All the Fords will still be available, and pretty much everything else. A land without Audis might be a good thing anyway, I’m convinced they are all driven by narcissistic morons.

France. Well, the import of frogs’ legs, snails, berets, stripy shirts and strings of onions might fall off but that won’t kill us. We’ll get used to it. Italy? We can make our own pizza and espresso. Spain? Yeah, running in front of bulls, you can keep that one. Germany? Most German lagers are brewed in the UK already and if you make the brewery staff redundant, they know how to set up another one. Sauerkraut, yeah, we’ll manage without that.

Belgium… chocolate. Very nice chocolate, but chocolate has a limited lifespan as a product. It comes from a clone crop and can be eradicated by one disease. Inevitably, one day, chocolate will be gone.

Really Brexit is no big deal for us even if it’s hard Brexit and we just stick up two fingers and walk away. The EU know this. They also know that if we do it that way, a few other countries will say ‘Hey, that was easy’ and do the same. I say we take the lead.

Someone has to. It would mean our leaders acting as grown-ups again. It would be good for us and good for the rest of the world too.

Might shake a few other countries out of their tantrums.


Bunnies and chocolate

The author copies of ‘Tales the Hollow Bunnies Tell’ are on the way to the contributing authors. They are in the gentle hands of the post office sorting gorillas and should arrive in a day or two.

Meanwhile, it seems a Food Guru has been getting paid by a chocolate company and this is an Evil Thing in antisugar world.

Towards the end of that article we see ‘no industry funding of research should be accepted’ which will bring a smirk to the face of Big Tobacco and Big Booze and others. Mine too.

I work for commercial food companies. Tomorrow I’m driving to Inverness to talk about cheese. I do not do dodgy research like the anti-everything shitheads produce. If I don’t think it will work I will tell them that. If they want to pressure me into getting a particular result, I go home. I’m a research consultant, not a PR consultant. You want lies, go talk to ASH or pretty much any politician. If your stuff turns out to be crap or even dangerous, that’s what my report will say. Up to you to publish or suppress it.

The thing I’m going to talk about tomorrow cannot possibly be dangerous. It sounds like it could be really impressive but we’ll see. It would be a nice change for me to work with something that doesn’t come with the proviso ‘one slip and you die’.

I haven’t ever worked for a salt or sugar producer. I’d love to work for a chocolate company, the freebies would be most welcome. However, working for a company does not temper my comments. I don’t much care about money because I’ve never had very much of it and it’s not interesting in itself. It just lets me buy more train stuff on eBay.

I will, and have, lost research work through honesty. I could have taken the money for projects that were never going to work but I told them at the first meeting – ‘this cannot work because…’

It’s all good. I might not have much but I seem to be able to get what I need. It’s not true that working for a company means you are owned by that company – not unless you want to be. Nobody can offer me enough to keep silent if I see something to rant about. I cannot stop the rants. Okay, I’ve never really tried but I probably couldn’t. Research is different. It’s commercial so no details. Company behaviour is fair game.

I know someone high in the ranks of the Scottish Food Standards Agency. She doesn’t like me much. That’s understandable. We worked together on probiotics for a while and we were at loggerheads most of the time. I wanted it to work, she wanted to please the company sponsors. She got the high paying job, I ended up redundant and self-employed.

I think I got the better deal in the end, although it has been tough at times. Even so, my principles are intact. I win. She has riches, I have integrity. I still say I win.

So okay. This nutritionist does a bit of work for a chocolate company. Does that disqualify her as a nutritionist? Depends what she tells them to a small extent. It depends on whether she lets them tell her what to tell others to a much larger extent, and I doubt that is happening. No chocolate company would ever attempt to say ‘choc is good for you’ at this moment. Even when there is real research that shows it is.

Her Righteous friends have declared her heretic. She touched the enemy! Yes, they are really that insular.

It’s a witch hunt. ‘You took money from a proper company rather than live like a tapeworm on taxes? A Witch! Burn her!’

Silence her in case she refutes the Doctrine of the Drones. This has happened so many times now and still the drones believe it all. How do these people remember to breathe? I have cultures of bacteria that wouldn’t fall for this kind of idiot programming. People fall for it all – smoking, vaping, global warming, salt, sugar, you name it, they will believe it.

The Righteous have learned how to manipulate the drones. It was never hard. Bread and circuses gave them the way to do it. Labour party and television took their drone lives from them and ripped away all the potential they could have had. They won’t see it, don’t bother. They are lost and they love their oblivion. They are parasites and proud of it. They don’t even realise they have a purpose and a master who controls their thoughts, but it will hit them smack in the face someday soon.

Too late to resist. Their domino will fall and they will look for support – but all the supporting dominoes are already down. The ones who produced, who worked, who made money. The ones they toppled. In the name of Fighting Big Companies For No Reason Other Than That They Exist.

The dominoes are going down. Everyone’s turn is coming. Can you stop it? My domino is already down and I see nobody who wants to help re-stand it. Why would I help with yours? I’ll just drop a hint.

If you want to wipe out an ants’ nest, you have to kill the queen. Then you get peace.


Do you see your enemy now? I know most of the readers here already have but one day a curious drone might happen by.

They’ll just mind-wipe what they’ve read though.  Maybe, just one, will understand.

For one, it’s all worth the effort.


No, it’s not about pizza.

Today I was blocked again on Twitter. It’s what the indoctrinated and the one-track-minded would love to do in real life: just silence any alternative viewpoint. Except… it doesn’t silence anyone. It just stops the blocker’s involvement in the conversation.

So I guess the one who blocked me won’t see this. Should I start to care, I’ll be sure to post an update. I’ve given up on these people. They cannot bear to consider any other view and I long ago tired of talking to walls.

His argument was that cattle produce methane, methane causes global warming, so if people eat less beef there’ll be less cattle and thereby save the planet.

I pointed out that if he wants less cattle then he must also restrict all milk products. I mentioned falling dominoes. Twitter’s limitations did not allow me to elaborate the difference between beef and dairy herds and I doubt he’d be interested anyway. Nor would he be interested in hearing about all the other ruminant species out there. I’m blocked now but well, I’m not involved in education any more. The wilfully ignorant are not my problem. He’ll see it one day, when his personal domino falls, but I’m not here to save him. I’m here to save me, and anyone else who will listen.

My background is in intestinal microbiology. My PhD was on the metabolism in the gut of ruminant animals. So yes, I know what I’m talking about here.

I saw the bandwagon of methane reduction when it started. I worked in labs that jumped on that bandwagon. Some actually believed it would make a difference but most saw a good way to keep the department funded. Sadly, that part of science is necessary: experiments don’t pay for themselves. So, many labs run high-profile projects for funding and do the interesting stuff behind the scenes. You only get to hear about the interesting stuff when it finally does something impressive.

The interesting stuff won’t get any funding as speculation, it has to prove itself first. It does that on the back of bandwagon grants.

Methane is trivial as a greenhouse gas. It was long ago shown that water vapour is the major greenhouse effector but you can’t take exhalations and you can’t tax the sun on the ocean. Therefore, carbon dioxide and methane, extraordinarily tiny components of the air, have to be continuously blamed. There’s no money in steam.

If there was that much methane in the air then every time I lit a cigarette, the flare would be visible in Edinburgh. Methane isn’t inert, there are soil bacteria that use if for growth so it does get used up. It isn’t the final end product, it’s part of a cycle. I worked on methane oxidising bacteria as one of those Interesting Things at the back of another project. Didn’t get too far but I did get a paper out of it.

You cannot isolate one single reaction and claim you have the answer to the global ecosystem. It’s a very complex ecosystem. Change one part of it and all the rest will change to adapt to it. Like rabbits or cane toads in Australia – meddle with an ecosystem and all hell can break loose. One change is like toppling that first domino. It’s hard to stop the chain reaction once it starts.

The Green God’s religion does not recognise dominoes. To them, every scientific result is to be taken in isolation and then applied to the entire planet as Gospel. Unquestionable. ‘The science is settled’. Yeah, well, if it’s unquestionable then it’s not science. It’s a cult. They can’t grasp that.

The also can’t grasp that cows are not the only source of methane – in fact they aren’t even the major source. Mud flats, peat bogs, any swamp anywhere is pumping out methane all the time (I spent three years working on bacteria in estuarine mud flats too). And we won’t even start on what happens when a subsea methane clathrate collapses. The ice worms that live in them are cute though.

Cows don’t produce methane. No mammal does, not directly. Bacteria in their guts produce methane and those bacteria are not specific to the gut. They live in swampy ground and anywhere it’s wet and there’s no or very little oxygen. Including deep water. Cows are a small part of the whole ecosystem and yet they are to be wiped out to save the planet? Total extinction will have no measurable effect on methane production at all.

That’s not why they are being wiped out. They are to be removed so we don’t eat meat. There’s a reason for that.

I remember when butter was suddenly deemed a Terrible Thing. Spread butter on your toast and a heart attack was only hours away. It’s been shown to be bollocks now but it persisted for decades. It coincided with the rise of margarine, then the pretend-butter spreads I refer to as plasticine. Butter, it turns out, is healthier than the synthetics but it took a long time to get the truth past the censors.

Doesn’t matter if the cows are to be eradicated. All we’ll have left are the synthetics. Synthetic milk already exists. It’s horrible but it exists.

Sugar is suddenly evil. Well not really suddenly, it’s been sneered at for a long time. That started with the introduction of artificial sweeteners and has become harsher and more desperate recently as people are rejecting the synthetics in favour of actual sugar.

Today’s new product is insect protein. A whole industry is trying to get off the ground. Faced with the choice, would you pick the burger made from beef or the one made from cockroaches? Yeah, it’s not a hard choice.

So it has to be made a hard choice. Push up the price of meat with ‘greenhouse tax’ and ‘fat tax’ and boost the guilt trips and soon the roachburger is all you can afford. The drones fall for it every time.

I have seen Twitter drones insist that Electrofag is designed by the tobacco companies to keep us smoking. I don’t engage in conversation with that level of stupid, it’s so concentrated it might be contagious. There’s no point.

Electrofag is the biggest threat the tobacco companies have ever faced.  I have several and I like them – although I still like the real ones too. Many have switched away from the real ones to Electrofag, and many new ‘smokers’ became new vapers instead. Isn’t that what those who hate tobacco companies wanted? A big dent in their profits?

It’s not what those who live on other people’s earnings want. Tobacco taxes account for an enormous amount of revenue and Electrofag is denting that too. This should give anti-tobacco governments a problem. Their drones will want to cheer on the demise of tobacco but those at the top can’t allow it to happen. What happens to their funding, their very reason for existence, if we all switch to vaping?

Fortunately the drone mind is easy to manipulate. Just tell them it’s another kind of tobacco, tobacco companies sell it, and all vapers turn into smokers. Those are all total lies, none of them ever happened, but the drones need no evidence. They will believe what they are told and block anyone who tries to tell them anything different.

Twitter is perfect for drone control. They’ll block any reasonable voice and end up talking amongst themselves, just reinforcing the indoctrination they’ve been exposed to until the Cult of the Green God is ready to launch its own jihad on we filthy heretics.

It’s not new. Many cults have used the same techniques to produce blindly-believing followers. This one pretends to use science. Its pronouncements come from academics.

I’ve met an awful lot of academics. Some are at genius level, most are merely clever but some make you wonder how they got in there. I can think of two PhD’s I’ve met who made me wonder if the qualification was really worth anything at all.

Yes, there are idiot academics. They make up for their uselessness by fast-talking and sounding convincing. The cunning ones build a following and the really devious get the press on side. It’s hard to sack someone when the press has built them up to hero status.

Personally I avoid any contact with the press. I talked to one once, was totally misrepresented and had phone calls from genuine scientists wondering what the hell I was up to. Now, I have no comment for any reporter anywhere. Read the journal papers, wait for the data to be published. I’m not talking until that’s done. At the moment I work as a consultant for commercial companies so can’t say much of anything anyway.

I’ve never blocked anyone on Twitter and never been blocked for abusive language. I’ve been blocked twice for agreeing with people, once for sympathising, and a few times for trying to tell them the truth. They don’t want the truth, they want their beliefs.

Let them have their beliefs. I work in science. Everything I do can be questioned and sometimes, those questions reveal to me something I’ve missed. I do not silence dissent. I encourage it. It’s a source of new information. I have no time to play with those who believe ‘the science is settled’.

That’s a religion. I do not have time for religion.

Finally, I have books

I met my deadline for ‘Tales the Hollow Bunnies Tell’ but have been thwarted by delays at every turn. Usually when a book goes up on Amazon, I order it straight away and get it within days. Yes, I order a copy of every book I publish. It’s to check it prints okay. Also I send novel authors some free copies for bragging rights.

For this second anthology, all the authors elected to be paid in copies of the book. I ordered quite a lot and about ten days after that order, they are finally here. The author copies are now bundled up ready to post.

Smashwords are still finding problems with it so it’s not on Barnes and Noble etc yet. I think I might try doing that through instead. The latest is that they want all the author names on the cover and all in the description (which has a character limit) and then I have to email them so they can fiddle it into shape. They have a new system for anthologies which isn’t ready to use but they’re using it anyway. Perhaps I won’t bother with Smashwords for anthologies in future. Lulu doesn’t have the same reach but it gets into the most important places.

At least the Kindle version went through without a hitch.

There’s no problem with single-author books. Those go through right away. It’s just anthologies that seem to be a problem. With that in mind, I’ll close submissions for the Halloween anthology on 30th September so I can have it all in place and ready to advertise in time for Halloween. That still leaves time to think up stories.

In progress, and coming soon, are :

Han Snel, by Dirk Vleugels. A biography of a Dutch artist, in Dutch, which needs to be in colour. It’s going to be an expensive and somewhat niche book but it’s going ahead anyway. Maybe it’ll become famous one day, you never know.

Blackjack, by Mark Ellott. A collection of short stories of varying genre. Something for everyone.

The Mark, by Margo Jackson. An innocent man assailed by modern prejudices and ingrained ideologies lurches from one misinterpreted situation to another. Is he really innocent though? You have to decide for yourself.

Okay, back to work for me. On Tuesday I have to go to Inverness about microbiology stuff (no, I’m not sampling monster shit) so there is a lot to get done before then.

As well as complying with Smashwords’ new anthology rules without actually having any clear idea what they are…

Everything happens at once…

Finally, Amazon have dispatched my order of ‘Tales the Hollow Bunnies Tell’. Admittedly it was a large order: all the authors elected to be paid in books so I had to get a load in. I’ll have them Saturday and post them next week.

Smashwords keep asking for amendments to the ebook on their site, before they release it to other sellers. Damn. This hasn’t happened with any of the other books, only the one that was in before the deadline. It’ll get sorted out eventually.

Current projects are a biography of Han Snel, a Dutch painter, by Dirk Vleugels, Longrider’s short story collection ‘Blackjack’ and hopefully a novel that was sent in before Christmas. Margo, if you’re reading, I’ve sent email. I can’t progress that one without your agreement.

As for me, I’ve had the writing urge again. Writing until daylight returns – I shouldn’t do that too often, it’s knackering. Victor’s Will has made a lot of progress this past week. It’ll need heavy editing because there have been long dormant periods between writing sessions.

In May thee are local council elections here. I have taken great delight in putting the pamphlets through the shredder and watching the smug little faces turned into confetti. I’ll have to find the least bad one to vote for.

Then it turns out, I have to do it again in June because Tessie May, the Prime Monster, has called a very short notice general election. Why? Well, here’s the most plausible reason

The end of the likely tortuous Article 50 negotiations is a hard deadline set for March 2019.

Under the Fixed Term Parliaments Act, that’s when the Tories would be starting to prepare for a general election the following year, with what one cabinet minister described as certain “political needs”.

In other words, the government would be exposed to hardball from the EU because ministers would be desperate to avoid accepting anything that would be politically unpopular, or hold the Brexit process up, at the start of a crucial election cycle.

Finalising negotiations with an opponent who knows you’re vulnerable would be a very bad move. The EU could pressurise the UK government into accepting watered-down agreements so they don’t spook the public and risk getting wiped out in an election the following year. Putting the next election a few years behind the end of Brexit gives them a chance to show their policies can work before they go to the polls again.

There’s more to it. Plaid Cymru claim that a lot of Welsh Labour MPs are vulnerable to losing their seats to Plaid. If true, this election would give Labour a right kick in the nads and even if the Tories don’t increase their numbers, having the main opposition party reduced would make things easier for them.

It’s possible. Labour voters in Wales aren’t likely to vote Tory, ever, but they are quite likely to switch to Plaid Cymru.

Tessie isn’t going to go for TV debates. The childish ’empty chair’ gambit has been rolled out by the other parties once more. They really think an empty chair is a major scorecard victory for them. It’s playground politics – but there’s a lot of that about now.

Meanwhile, north of Hadrian’s Wall, little Nicky the Fish claims the SNP are the only party who can stop a hardline Tory government. Well I’m not voting for you, Nicky. Not until your party learns to act like a government rather than a bunch of handwringing nannying fussbuckets. We vote for politicians to run the country, not to tell us how we have to live. We do not become your property when you take office.

This is a big claim for a little woman. The Tory presence in Scotland is minimal already and they are hardly likely to form the next Scottish Assembly. It would be hilarious if they did though. The wailing would be heard in Canberra.

The SNP presence in Wastemonster is similarly trivial. They are not going to be making a big impact there any time soon. No, Fishwife, you won’t be stopping anyone anywhere – except stopping people in Scotland enjoying themselves. It’s what you do best, after all.

Timmy Farron, the Liberal Democrat, also thinks his party is the only one who can stop the Tories. There aren’t many left in Timmy’s gang and there might be even fewer in June.

Tessie has gambled on winning this election and getting a bigger majority. She’s in with a chance but it’s still down to chance. The short timescale will make it harder for the fake votes to build up but it also doesn’t give much time for any party to put their case to the electorate.

I hope she wins it, and comes out with a huge majority. Not because I’m a Tory supporter – I’m a nobody supporter – but because it would be nice to have a government that can actually make a decision for once. And because it would make our stance in Brexit negotiations so much stronger.

Brexit is happening. It can’t be stopped. We need to get a good deal on the way out and a weak government will get shat on by the smarmy bastards in the EU parliament. We need a strong government at this time, no matter who it is, and a government that recognises that the people voted for Brexit and we will damn well have it. No matter what the whiners say.

It’s going to be an entertaining few weeks.