The Pound Shop Electrofag returns

Two years ago I wrote about the 88vape Electrofag on sale for a pound – that was in Poundland. Well, the replacement clearomizers and the juices remained on sale at £1 each but the rechargeable kit vanished. I did see it briefly back on display recently but I think it was about £5. Still cheap.

I guess they can’t manage to sell that kit at £1 but after two years those rechargeable batteries are likely to be worn out. And yet the clearomizers and juices are still on sale to this day.

Now there has been a development. The display now includes a disposable, single use battery for £1. A bottle of juice, a clearomizer and a battery comes to £3. That’s still dirt cheap. Who could resist trying it out? Not me…

The clearomizer has to have the ‘contains nicotine’ warning on the pack even though it contains no nicotine until it’s unpackaged and filled. This is because our medics and government are run by mindless arseholes who have no idea what they are talking about – but everyone already knows that.

Inside the packs you get this –

The battery is clearly labelled ‘disposable’ because it is the same size and (obviously) has the same end connection as the rechargeables. If it fits the clearomizer it will also fit the charger but don’t do that. It’s likely to give you an indoor firework display you’ll never forget and always regret. The battery costs a pound. Get a new one.

Filling the clearomizer is simple enough – remove the black plastic mouthpiece and use the thin nozzle fitted to the bottle to run juice down the inside without getting it into the top of the vapouriser. Then screw the two parts together and you’re ready to roll. This one has a push-button to activate the heater. I don’t know if anyone still makes the ones you just had to take a puff on.

The juice I bought is ‘rolling leaf’ flavour, which I haven’t seen before so I thought I’d try it. As I’ve said many times here, I have yet to find a tobacco flavour that gets even close to real tobacco flavour. It might not be possible. This one is 10 ml of 16mg/g juice, good enough for a trial run.

So, is it any good? Well, it works. I find I have to hold the button down for longer to get a good head of steam. The battery isn’t as powerful as the 88vape rechargeable one by a long way but it does work. Maybe I got a dud this time. I’ll risk £1 to try another one next time I’m in town.

There is nothing on the packaging to indicate how long the battery can be expected to last. I’ll just have to see how it goes.

As for the flavour, well it is an improvement over other tobacco flavours I’ve tried but still, it’s not right. I won’t be throwing away the real thing just yet. Electrofag will remain a novelty for me so I can smoke coffee and roast chicken and absinthe. It doesn’t taste like a real cigarette – yet.

Still, if you’re a smoker who is curious about vaping and want to try it without buying a load of gadgetry, this is worth a punt. The minimum price for 20 cigarettes in the UK is now around £7.25 and if you want the good ones you’re going to be paying over £10 a pack. So risking £3 to try out vaping is well worth it.

You don’t have to worry about batteries blowing up on charging with this one, you just replace the battery. And even if it all ends up in the bin, well, you couldn’t buy half a pack of cigarettes for £3 so the loss is minimal.

So far, Electrofag isn’t going to turn me away from smoking but it has done just that for a huge number of people. Will it work for you? There’s only one way to find out and now you can try it for £3.

Worth a go, I’d say.

UPDATE: I tried the clearomizer on the old 88vape rechargeable battery (mine still works) and yes, that works much better. Could be I just bought a dud disposable battery. I’ll try another one next time I’m near Poundland.


Those who claim to care…

…usually don’t.

The antismokers don’t care about health. They make vicious attacks on smokers and vapers and are trying to ban vaping (so far, they’ve succeeded in Australia, land of the most gullible politicians on the planet). They only care about control and money.

The tax take from the remaining villified smokers is immense. Some of it pays the antismoker wages. Neither they, nor the politicians, want you to give up smoking or switch to vaping. They just enjoy punishing you for it and charging you for the privilege of being a hated pariah.

Really, they have tried to claim that breathing steam is even more harmful than breathing smoke. The claims made about smoking causing everything from death to dandruff passed the absurdity horizon long ago. The claims of harm from vaping started inside that horizon and are well on the way to the stupidity singularity. Don’t for a moment imagine that any of this is being done for your benefit. It’s being done for theirs. You don’t matter at all.

Climatologists know the climate changes all the time. They’ve been at that scam for many years. When the climate was cooling in the seventies, we were warned about a coming ice age unless we cut our carbon emissions. Now the climate is warming up a bit, the planet will turn into Venus unless we cut our carbon emissions. Oh, and of course, we have to give them lots of money for their pet projects in order to save the world. People fall for this shit in droves. It’s why religion does so well – people just love a good Armageddon story. Especially when they believe they will be saved and we horrible proles will all die.

Now we have ‘gender fluidity’, a step on the way to gender neutrality all round. The medics are cashing in, as usual, using terms like ‘assigned female/male at birth’ rather than sticking to biological facts. Eight-year-olds are being targeted for ‘gender reassignment’ and why? Because it’s good for them? Hahahaha!

Because it makes money for those pushing this nonsense and, deeper, it furthers the Marxist equality agenda which is, of course, a total control agenda. You don’t even get to decide whether you are male or female. The State decides for you.

Soon babies will be surgically neutered at birth and assigned a gender when the State decides they have reached adulthood – and the way things are going that’ll be when you are about 30. Until then you will be neuter. There can be no sex discrimination if you don’t have one. It’s for your own good and you will be amazed at how many people will believe that.

Currently we have Antifa and the KKK in open war on the streets of America. Personally I’d tell the police to stay out of the way and let them wipe each other out. Both claim to know the best way to run American society and both would create a police state – just with different targets. America has experienced McCarthyism and I bet most people don’t want it back.

None of these groups care about you. The people don’t matter at all. They just want to be in control and they want you to pay for it.

Governments do not serve the people any more. Anywhere. In some places, they never did but at least they were open about it. Now there is no government anywhere that exists for any other reason than to control their people and take money from them.

As for the medical profession, well, here’s a tale that puts that bunch of gourd-wavers into perspective. They claim to care about you, but you come second to their personal prejudices.

One day I will be diagnosed with something that will kill me. Or maybe not, maybe I’ll be flattened by a bus or a meteor or blown up by a peaceful religion or stabbed to death in the name of a god of love. But, hopefully, I’ll have a diagnosis telling me I have weeks or months to live.

You will not get me into a hospital. I will smoke everything I can find and drink so much I’d be dead three days before even I noticed. There’ll be no need to embalm me, my body will last longer than Babylonian pickles. I will try class A drugs if I can get hold of any. I never have yet.

If I am told I am in my last months I am going to try everything I can in those months. I will not be tied down in a hospital with my tobacco placed just out of reach because ‘it’s bad for me’. That is beyond cruel. That is actually evil.

It has reached the stage where if anyone says ‘it’s for your benefit’ I automatically look for how they will benefit.

Invariably, they benefit. I never do.



Letter to Theresa

Frank Davis has brought to my attention a very calm,. measured and rage-free letter sent to Tessie ‘Jackboots’ May by an older lady. A currently vaping ex-smoker. Which, in the eyes of the total morons most countries have accepted as Health Dictator, is the same thing anyway.

I like older women. There aren’t so many of them around now, I find.

We seem to be doing a little better with the health Nazis in the UK but not much. When the Nanny doesn’t want to be called ‘nanny’ but insists on nannying anyway, it’s not going to end well. Not for nanny.

But hey, let’s keep it calm and measured and none of the modern frantic swivel-eyed stuff. I mean, I know I’m moving fast forward in time here and when my scythe arrives I will have reached the technological prowess of the Amish. The rest of America won’t take much longer to catch up on.

A quick side note – if you want to track vaping posts here, don’t type ‘vaping’ in the search bar. I don’t call it that. I have called it ‘Electrofag’ from the beginning and always will.

Without further ado, here is a video even better than Bowie’s excellent ‘Letter to Hermione

It is more logical and makes more sense.





The media silence cracks

First of all, I finally got ‘Blackjack’ through every technical hitch CreateSpace could throw at me. The page isn’t fully built but it has begun. The Kindle and Smashwords eBook versions have been up for a while. The eBook is also through Smashwords’ filter now and will be appearing on Barnes and Noble, Kobo etc very soon. If you don’t want a Kindle format one, Smashwords has it in almost any format you could possibly want. That goes for all the previous books too.

Okay. So, have I calmed down a bit after last night’s rant? Not at all. I am more furious than ever. Not only have I remembered that it is in fact eleven years of exile for us here in Scotland, not a mere ten that the English are moaning about, but something Roobeedoo posted made me think.

We’re all banging on about pub closures. What about all that taxi income? Long after the buses have stopped running we often needed a taxi to get home after a night of drinking. If it’s a long way and after midnight that’s a big fare. More than eleven years ago it cost me about £30 to get home from a boozy night in Aberdeen (not quite, a mate of mine got dropped off halfway and paid his share) but that compares with about £3 back then if the buses ran that late. I wonder what it would cost now?

Of course I’ll never find out. I’m not going drinking in Aberdeen because half the pubs I liked are gone and the ones that are left have all banned smokers. There’s no justification for spending on a large taxi fare just to have a shitty evening standing around outside in the rain. I could do that at home. At home, I can smoke inside.

The taxis suffered from the loss of pubs caused by the smoking ban too. I expect those late night shops selling mysterious meat from the ‘kebab’ – a strange animal with no internal organs – suffered also. Now I come to think of it, there do seem to be fewer of those shops than there used to be. I wonder if there are any figures on those things? How many of the late night takeaways, of all kinds, now close at 10?

The media stayed silent on the ban or ran more propaganda from the Dreadful Arnott on how great it was. They kept that tone until now.

It’s changing. The media are starting to question the fake science behind it all. They are pointing out how it was done and how it is being extended to everything else.

In Australia, the automatic respect expected by dickheads like Simon Chapman is no more. That one is more about vaping, which is banned in Australia because it interferes with the tax funding that pays for dickheads like Simon Chapman.

It’s now being recognised that it was the smoking ban that killed pubs. Not the economic downturn, not the ‘temporary loss in sales ‘. The earlier bans in Scotland and Ireland showed the lie of the ‘economic downturn’ story.

It’s all been based on lies. Well over ten years of lies and it has taken until now for it to even start to come out. But once it starts, well, there’s likely to be no way to stop it.

There is a reason behind all the crap science that is published now. That reason lies in the ‘target driven culture’ so espoused by the socialists. You have to meet the target even if you reach  the required level by standing on a pile of elephant shit. So, that’s what people do.

When I left mainstream science and went solo, it was already more money-driven than knowledge-driven. Promotions went to those who had big grants even if the research quality was based on ‘give the funders the answer they want and they’ll fund more’. It wasn’t like that when I started. It’s never been like that for me. That’s why I’ll never be rich.

The cracks in the target-driven, money-oriented corruption of what used to be called ‘science’ are widening. Those cracks will swallow a lot of the utter nonsense out there now, including, eventually, the smoking ban and all its Puritan vile control freaks. It’s all going to fall down just like it has every time they’ve tried this in the past.

But don’t get complacent. They’ll be back.

A new Electrofag – Aspire Pockex

I have a new Electrofag to review. I’ve been sent samples to review before and reviewed some I bought myself. This is one of the free samples – well, it’s free as long as I write a review. No money changed hands either way, and the freebiness of the sample won’t affect my opinion. I have never signed any agreement, with anyone, to only give good reviews. I know that happens. I’ve never been asked to sign one and if I ever am, I’ll decline. So this review is unchecked by the sender of the sample and untainted by any restrictions on what I say. As if any such restriction could ever hold.

Technical stuff first. The one I have is an Aspire Pockex in stainless steel, with blueberry flavoured vaping juice and was supplied by Ecigwizard.They have quite a range of vaping stuff on that site. I haven’t looked at new vaping stuff for a while and I’m surprised there’s so much of it.

This Electrofag is priced at £19.99 (ex-VAT, so VAT will add £4 to that price), the 10 ml bottle of juice at 52p (ex-VAT, still cheaper than Poundland!). With postage and VAT added the total cost would be £30.60. I did get mine by next day delivery so maybe postage will be less if you can wait a few days.

In the UK you’ll be lucky to get four packs of cigarettes for £30 so if you buy one of these and use it for a total of four days, you’ll break even. That assumes you smoke a pack a day – I know some people who’d break even if they used it for a day and a half.

Compared with current UK tobacco prices it’s not expensive at all. But then any Electrofag can make that claim because UK tobacco prices are ridiculous.

So, here’s what arrived today –

On the box is the insanity of Tobacco Control. Not one word of truth in that warning label but we’ve been over this many times. In small print beneath it states ‘The above warning only applies when this device has been filled with nicotine containing e-liquid’.

So you have a warning in large print followed by ‘not really, we’re only kidding’ in small print. Since you can get zero-nicotine vape juice, that warning and its small print will, in some cases, be a total and absolute lie. That’s the lunacy that passes for law in this country now. I’m surprised they haven’t demanded pictures of steam-burn victims on the packs yet. I’m sure they will.

The addictiveness of nicotine is a farce. CStM will smoke if she’s stressed or drunk but never otherwise. During my PhD I knew a guy who would smoke a whole pack when drunk but next morning he was a nonsmoker again. For me the turning point was a 20-hour flight to Beijing. No smoking at the airport or on the way. It didn’t bother me at all – and I was expecting it to! No, it’s not addiction. It’s just nice, like pineapple slices or tea. More British people drink tea than smoke/vape. Is tea an addiction? Go on, I dare you 🙂

But I digress. The first thing I noticed was that it’s a really sturdy box. This one comes very well packaged. I actually did read the battery safety leaflet which is unusual for me. I notice the batteries should be changed every 3-6 months. I think I’d opt for buying a whole new set every 6 months – at the price, why faff about with battery changes? You’ll want a new tank and mouthpiece before then anyway. Oh, all the spares are on the website too.

As a smoker, the difference between paying £7.50 a day for cigs and paying £30 every six months for an Electrofag is pretty incredible. If it ‘turns’ me. We’ll see…

(Actually I’m paying less than £4 a day at the moment because I bought a caseload back from Denmark but we’ll gloss over that part. Running an Electrofag would still be a hell of a lot cheaper).

I can hear you screaming about now: ‘Open the bloody box!’ Okay, okay…

The Aspire Pockex is in a foam inlay next to a long black box containing a spare heater thingy (I know there are technical terms for these, I don’t care) and a USB cable. Just a plain USB cable with a mini connector at one end.

I’ve never seen this before. Every other Electrofag I’ve had requires you to take it apart and plug the battery into a special charger. They all look much the same, those chargers, but they’re not quite the same and if you use the wrong one you risk ‘boom’. It’s scary because the old ones don’t all have labels on them.

This one has a mini USB port in the bottom. Just plug it in. No dismantling, no messing about with a powerful lithium battery with both terminals at the same end (always scary). I like that innovation. I expect vapers are going ‘Oh we’ve had that for ages’ but it’s still a first for me.

There are instructions in the box but meh, I already read the battery instructions. That’s enough instruction for today.

The design is sleek and not too big. I’ve never been a fan of those ones that look like they belong in an electrician’s toolbox or in the hands of a Star Trek security guard. Yes, I know they are popular but they look like too much to carry around to me. This design suits me. Fits in a pocket and won’t be mistaken for some kind of stun gun.

It has 2 ml capacity (again, that’s the law now, nothing the supplier can do about it until Government contains someone with an actual brain) and the top plate with mouthpiece unscrews to access the tank. The heater thingy came out with it – I unscrewed the heater from the lid and screwed it back into the socket in the base of the tank. Make sure the little white window is at the bottom if you do this, because otherwise it won’t work. I don’t think it will fit the other way around anyway.

With the entire top off it’s very easy to add e-liquid to the tank, up to the fill line that’s halfway up the tank.Then you just screw the top back on. Apparently you can change the heater thingy without emptying the tank first. I’ll try that when the heater thingy breaks.

Here I had to look at the instructions. Pressing the button did nothing – you have to press it five times fast to turn it on, then you just press to vape. Pressing five times again turns it off so it won’t go off in your pocket. That’s worth remembering (I didn’t, hence mysterious hiss from shirt pocket earlier today).

So, I have a shiny Electrofag ready to go…

I like that it stands securely on its base. Putting down a tank-fill Electrofag can be a tricky thing. The Poundland one I tried needed to be propped against something or it would topple over. This one has a wide flat base and feels very stable even on the desk of a keyboard-batterer like me.

The blueberry vape juice is very smooth with none of the chemically harsh aftertaste of the early e-liquids. It’s actually very very nice indeed. I’ve puffed quite a bit already and saved some money on real-baccy cigs. It has passed the smoke ring test – I can blow smoke rings with it even though they aren’t really smoke at all. They look the same. Good enough.

The vape button has a light inside. When you press, it lights up blue and stays lit for a second or so after you release it. Gives you time to check it. You need to, because if it lights up pink you have less than 30% charge left and it’s plug-in time. Well, you can probably run a while longer on 30%, no need to panic.

I like this one. It’s light, it doesn’t look like it has a car battery in it and it’s not designed by H.R. Giger. Okay, hardcore vapers like to have things that look like they fell off a spy satellite but I prefer small, light, sleek and non-bizarre. The Aspire Pockex works for me.

Will it stop me smoking? Even Death might have trouble with that, it’s a hard call. I like smoking but it’s getting painfully expensive now. So using an Electrofag to reduce the expense of tobacco is a good thing for me. As a dual-fuel smoker/vaper, I don’t want to shell out for the Space Ranger versions. I want an occasional-use one that isn’t going to bulk out my pockets and isn’t going to make me look like I’m sucking a folded up multitool.

It also doesn’t produce a cloud of vapour that looks like a damn cumulo-nimbus at ground level. I never understood why vapers take such pride in that. They can decry smokers while producing an entire cigarette’s worth of ‘smoke’ in one breath. That’s just drawing attention to yourselves. No wonder Tobacco Control is after you.

The Aspire Pockex makes as much vapour as I usually exhale from real smoking. It’s a good transition tool for a smoker, it doesn’t  make you feel like you just breathed out Global Warming. With no lingering smoke smell and even the blueberry scent vanishes in seconds. Just like all Electrofags.

Also you don’t have ashtrays to empty. That’s good too.

In the end though, I don’t think any Electrofag will stop me smoking. I love the flavours and the gadgetry but one thing that’s impossible to get right is tobacco flavour. You can’t have a generic tobacco flavour. Each blend of tobacco is different. It’s pot luck if the tobacco flavoured juice matches the one you usually smoke. If it happens to match, well great, but I haven’t found one for me yet.

And I just bought a new lighter. One of the fierce ones that doubles as a welding torch. I also like my Zippos. I like real fire. I like real burning cigarettes.

However, as I said, smoking is becoming a nastily expensive hobby. So, using a good, smooth-vaping Electrofag to reduce my intake of real tobacco is helpful. This one is more likely to ‘stick’ than any I’ve had before. It’s easy to use, easy to fill with the really wide open top, it stands nicely beside the keyboard with no wobbles to make me nervous and the vape is really smooth with no nasty throat aftertaste.

I think this one is for us dual-fuel types. The total-vape types will want a car battery and spark plug taped to a tank containing a litre of vape juice but if you just want to cut down a bit, save some cash, but not actually give up the real thing for now, this Electrofag is a good one to do that. It’s like a step on the way. It’s not for the hardcore, it’s for the smoker who wants to try it out.

At the price, well, it’s only going to cost four packs of fags to try it. And let’s face it, that’s really not much of a risk. If you’re a pack-a-day smoker and this thing cuts your intake by half, you break even in 8 days. After that you’re saving money. You’re paying less tax to fund antismokers. That’s a good thing all round.

I’d aim this one at the smoker who hasn’t tried vaping yet. The full-on vapers are going for things sold by the Weapon Shops of Isher (look it up if you don’t know it) but smokers wondering about trying vaping aren’t going to shell out for those gadgets and might be a bit scared of them.

They might go for an Aspire Pockex. It’s easy to use for a beginner and looks close to a cigarette and not scary at all. It’s light and solid-feeling and stable and easy to fill and charge. And it doesn’t look like something found in the remains of an exploded Dalek.

One thing though – a bit more detail on the filling instructions would be good. Just saying ‘top fill’ assumes you already know what you are doing. If you want to catch the not-yet-vapers among the smokers, you need to give them details.

Write the instructions for someone who’s never seen anything like this before and you’ll be ahead of every Electrofag seller out there. They all write instructions for vapers, not smokers.

All told though, if you’re a smoker who has wondered about vaping, this is a good one to start with.

Vaping might or might not save your life, meh, who cares? When did a smoker ever worry about longevity?

It can save you a shitload of money though.


The Pen is mightier than the Sword

…but it seems Le Pen is not as mighty as a Macaroon.

France has a pro-EU, Brussels puppet as its leader. Well, it’s what they voted for. I don’t know how much real power the French President has – don’t his pronouncements have to go through Parliament? I’ve no idea, perhaps one of the France-occupying readers can tell us. Not our problem, since the UK is now on a no-going-back route out of the EU. We’ve even been deleted from their propaganda leaflets.

At least there aren’t likely to be riots, at least not by the French. It seems clear in modern politics that one side always accepts losing a vote while the other side scream about voting being non-democratic because they didn’t get what they wanted. Then they have protests to overturn the vote in the name of democracy. These are usually violent.

It’s always the same sides too.

It’s rather like the Church of Climatology’s thought process. It gets a little warmer, that’s global warming. It gets unusually cold, ‘weather is not climate’. In the same way, Socialism only recognises democracy if they win the vote.

This kind of doublethink is endemic now.

I bought New Scientist this week. First time for ages. There is a feature article about air pollution. Apparently, at least in the West, it’s not so bad. China, India, Bangladesh… well they are effectively going through their industrial revolution phase and that’s always messy. The cities in those countries get smog like London used to get. Pretty pointless pushing to ban smoking there – but they do anyway.

The article carries a chart showing causes of death. Predictably, smoking is near the top. What’s interesting is that nowadays, nobody just dies any more. Everyone dies of something that could have been prevented if only the NHS could force them to live pure lives. It seems based on the premise that if we remove all risks from life, nobody will ever die again. Except… of boredom.

While the article shows a rapid fall in air pollution in the UK, the editorial laments the UK government’s failure to tackle air pollution. It’s headed with a picture of a smoggy street which is quite clearly not in the UK. The cars are on the wrong side of the road and the no-parking lines are red, not yellow.  They didn’t even bother to spend five minutes with Photoshop to make it half-convincing. What really hurts is that PhD level scientists will read that crap and not question it.

The editorial calls for some kind of legally-enforced action from the government while the article claims all major atmospheric pollutants are in decline in the UK’s air.

I don’t mean the smoke from half a gram of burning leaves. I mean properly toxic stuff. The UK’s air is getting cleaner. Remember that when the new anti-motorist regulations come into force so that the Green Men can breathe pure air in the cities. I’m glad I don’t live in one.

We now have the latest big push from antismoking to classify vaping as smoking. It’s clearly not smoking. For one thing there’s no smoke. No tobacco either. It’s getting to where rechargeable batteries and USB connectors are likely to be classified as tobacco products – and politicians all over the world can’t seem to understand why they are now openly ridiculed. If there is one thing more likely to see you more universally despised than being a smoker, it’s becoming a politician.

The antismokers say they want us to stop smoking but only using their approved methods. You know, the ones they get paid to push. Not some independent method that’s been shown to work for an awful lot of people, oh no, can’t have that.

“Nicotine is ‘addictive and deadly’. To help you escape its clutches we’ll sell you patches and gum loaded with… nicotine.”

What they really want is to get you ‘addicted’ to their own nicotine delivery method, so they can cash in.

Warnings on cigarettes, warnings about the alleged addictiveness of nicotine on vaping gear… seen any warnings on the patches and gum? Of course not. Seen any public shouting about people under 18 getting hold of patches and gum? Neither have I.

Approved nicotine is magically safe to prescribe. Non-approved nicotine is deadly and will kill you along with everyone in a 100-metre radius. Every time a smoker lights up in public we are like slow motion suicide bombers. That is what modern medicine, and our Governments, actually believe.

Really. They genuinely believe it. In the old days, schools used to teach chemistry and anyone from those days will have no trouble finding the chemical structure of nicotine. It’s a simple molecule. The nicotine in patches is the same as the nicotine in tobacco. The same as the nicotine in vape steam.

I’m still amazed no doctor has been charged with attempted murder for prescribing nicotine patches after telling us it’s deadly and addictive. Why hasn’t that happened? It’s wide open, that goal.

You know, some vapers don’t even have nicotine in their steam. Some have found that it’s the action of smoking they like. The taste, blowing smoke rings, all that stuff. The nicotine isn’t really necessary. I’ve tried it in my own Electrofags. Nicotine isn’t the biggest part of smoking, it’s the taste and the action that matters. That’s why Electrofag has worked for so many people. Not for me, not yet. The strange flavours are a lot of fun but I haven’t found a tobacco flavour that tastes just right. Maybe one day.

It must be difficult to keep a war on smokers and a war on motorists going at the same time. A war on all forms of transport, in fact, other than electric Noddy cars and trains made by Hornby. They have to ramp up the same pretend risks for both wars without anyone questioning how you can die twice. They seem to be managing this quite well because the general public have failed to notice.

There have been several Dalek and other alien invasions of Earth. Remember those? Nobody does, and in subsequent episodes the Doctor puts it down to the human ability to blot out anything that doesn’t fit their worldview.

He’s right. Humanity is easily controlled. Has been easily controlled for a very long time. It’s a herd. The oft-used sheep analogy is not misplaced. Those of us who won’t run with the herd are treated as anomalies and freaks – and perhaps we are. We like it that way.

Some of us will always refuse to obey. Some of us will snarl back at the sheepdogs. Some of us will remember and write it down for the future’s annoying buggers to know they are not alone.

The pen is, still, mightier than the sword.

Just watch out for macaroons…

The laws that aren’t

Many people regard the saying ‘the customer is always right’ as if it’s a law. It’s not. It’s company policy at Marks and Spencer. It applies to no other business, anywhere, unless the business chooses to implement it.

I wouldn’t recommend it. It attracts the most arrogant, self-righteous, pompous bastards to your shop where they know they can behave like spoiled brats and be pandered to. It also wrecks staff morale because if the customer is always right, then by extension the staff member they are arguing with is always wrong. High staff turnover and eternal training costs are the natural consequence.

It’s not a law, no matter how many people think it is. Any other shop can tell you to piss off and never return and there is not a damn thing you can do about it.

Via @Dick_Puddlecote on Twitter, it seems there is a non-law that says nonsmokers can’t be sold Electrofags. Oh, some bunch of self-important Public Health arseholes spent a lot of time and taxpayer’s money ‘secret shopping’ in vape shops. Will they sell it to us if we don’t smoke?


It’s a vape shop. The only customers who go inside are ones who want to buy an Electrofag. So the shopkeeper doesn’t ask if they already smoke. Indeed, they are not allowed to sell Electrofag as a stop-smoking aid so asking if the customer smokes could be seen as a violation of that rule. They are only required to check the customer is over 18. Electrofag sellers have always done that. There was never any need to force them to do it.

This ridiculous farce is no different to a vegan group secret shopping in a butcher’s and then getting all uppity because the butcher will sell meat to vegans. The butcher will sell meat to anyone who wants it. It’s a meat shop. If you don’t want meat, don’t go in there.

I’ve never been inside a New Look shop. They sell women’s clothes. I don’t want any. Should I go in and buy something then call the newspapers because they sold a bra to a man? It’s really no different to what Public Health have just done.

In all the years I’ve been smoking, I have never once been asked if I’m a smoker or non-smoker when buying baccy. Can we expect ASH and Public Health to raid Tesco and Morrison’s next, because they went in and asked for a pack of cigarettes and the retailer neglected to ask if they smoked? I think the retail response would be ‘if they don’t want to smoke them, why did they want to buy them?’

Every smoker once bought his or her first pack of cigarettes (in my case it was cigars) and every vaper once bought their first Electrofag. So now some people want to skip the smoking part and go straight to Electrofag. Well why not? Would Public Health really prefer them to start on tobacco and then switch to steam?

Honestly. Politicians listen to what these people say, you know. Unquestioningly. It’s seriously time to apply a minimum IQ to anyone wanting to stand for election because we are being led by utter cretins.

As for the medics, well, I have no faith at all in modern medicine. They used to employ intelligent medics but no longer, it seems. Now all you need to become a medic is the ability to absorb indoctrination and to shut down the analytical part of your mind in order to qualify. Where we once had medics, we now have drones. They just think what they are told to think and they diagnose based on personal prejudice rather than medicine.

If only the medics and politicians could see all the parasites stuck to them. ASH serves no purpose beyond being a new Smoker Inquisition. All the lifestyle dictators in the NHS are the reason it’s always short of medical staff and medicines. Get the parasites out, get proper doctors and nurses in, and we’ll have a damn good health service again.

Physicians, heal thyselves.

Now we are told that crisps are evil. Full of deadly things like fat and salt and… acrylamide.

Oh there’s no law on acrylamide content. There are guidelines but not a law. As for crisps, well, is there anyone out there who thinks crisps are health food? They are a snack. A small snack, a fraction of a potato in a bag. There might be a lot of fat and salt and other crap as a proportion of the weight of crisps in a bag, but the total weight really isn’t very much. Diluted by one human body, even a small one, it amounts to bugger all.

This is the same game as ‘there are 600 deadly chemicals in a cigarette’. A typical cigarette contains 0.6g of tobacco. Ignore the fact that most of it is cellulose (it’s made of leaves, I feel I have to point that out considering the level of intelligence we have to deal with in government and medicine these days) and let’s pretend it’s 0.6g of just the deadly chemicals.

Let’s also pretend there is no ash residue and nothing at all comes off as smoke.

That gives us 0.006g of each deadly chemical. The reality is far, far smaller than that. Scared? I’m not. I’m more scared of diesel fumes on a busy street – and I’m not that scared of those either. Okay, that’s partly because I live on a farm at least 11 miles from a town of any size, but I don’t feel the need to cover my face when visiting the town.

I don’t often eat crisps but when I do, I don;t worry about the salt and fat content. I’m not going to worry about acrylamide in crisps because I like the crispy bits on the outside of roast meat. I know there will be many daft sods out there who will be scared. Including every single politician and medic.

The crisp story doesn’t scare me at all because when you change the percentages into real quantities eaten, they amount to… bugger all. Just like the deadly stuff in smoke. Just like the evil thickening agent (no, idiots, it’s NOT antifreeze) that’s food grade and found in yogurts and loads of other things.

Yet again, the news is up in arms over the breaking of a law that isn’t. The idea behind it all, of course, is to make it law. The general zombie population won’t even notice because they already thought it was a law.

And, once vape shops have to check if you’re a smoker before they sell you Electrofag, Tesco will have to check if you’re a smoker before they sell you any tobacco. Having watched how these evil bastards work for decades, their next logical step isn’t hard to work out.

Then you won’t be able to buy drink unless you can prove you’re a drinker… and so on. They can’t stop us so they’ll kill us off by attrition. Nonsmokers will never be able to take up smoking or vaping, nondrinkers will never be able to buy booze. I know, I can feel the shrugs now. If you don’t smoke and/or drink now, why would you?

I’m not talking about you. I’m talking about those currently growing up who might be looking forward to turning 18 so they can try these things. In the future the only way they’ll get to try them will be to buy totally unregulated stuff from criminal gangs.

Won’t happen? Public Health and ASH and the rest of the nannies will tell you it won’t happen.

Like it didn’t happen when heroin and cocaine were made illegal…

Basically, in the future, all your kids are fucked. You think the Righteous care?

They’re doing it on purpose.