The Caliphate of Canada

Many Americans, especially the rich and famous luvvies of Hollywood, said they would move to Canada if Trump won the election. I neither know nor care if any of them actually did it.

Well, Canada has now made blasphemy a punishable offence. Only blasphemy against Islam, of course. You can make nose jokes about Jews and send Jesus a Screwfix catalogue open at the nails page, no problem. You can poke fun at Kali (probably best not to, just in case, she’s pretty badass) and you can say you have the body of a god – unfortunately it’s Buddha – and nobody minds. You can watch and laugh at those Japanese ‘Monkey’ shows that were a total piss take of the Chinese god Hanuman and your front door will never feel the kick of a single jackboot.

Say one word against Beard Boy and his baby-shagging habits and the police will arrive, stroke their beards and smooth down their one piece white uniforms, then give you a formal warning that will leave you about eight inches shorter.

They were going to run from Trump to a country that just set itself back into the fourteenth century. Blasphemy laws. Really? In 2017 we have new blasphemy laws? And you lot were scared of Trump? You were enraged that he wanted to restrict travel from those countries where such blasphemy laws still exist? And you decided the safest place to be was… an Islamic dictatorship.

Excuse me while I giggle a bit.

I know there are politically correct cretins thinking ‘Oh but if you don’t say anything bad about Islam, you’ll be fine’. You fucking idiots. Read up on the Spanish Inquisition. You don’t have to do anything wrong. It’s a law against spoken words. You don’t have to actually say the words. All it takes is for someone to report that you said it. Then, frankly, you are screwed.

And when an Islamist blows up a train with your mother on it, or sells your daughter to his friends as a sex slave (as happens in the UK) you can’t say anything about it. Tell it to the police and they’ll arrest you for Islamophobia. Hey, you let it happen. Don’t shoot the messenger.

Sharia works in much the same way as the Inquisition. Seriously, read up on it. God can never be wrong so if you are arrested by religious police you must be guilty of something. Pretty much all 14th-century religions had that attitude.

Islam has won Canada. You think it stops with this new law? Hahahaha! Canada is two years from cutting hands off thieves, rape victims needing four witnesses, gay people dropped from skyscrapers and public stonings and beheadings. Unless the Canadians do something about it, starting right now. Time’s up guys. As the old saying goes, shit or burst. Do something now or suffer the consequences.

For all the bad stuff said about Trump, he would never let this happen in the USA.

Canada, have a song from that other bastion of control freakery, Australia. At least you can still speak there.

 

When reality falls apart

Browsing the news is strange now. You might as well treat Viz comic as your major source of information. Some of the characters in there wouldn’t be out of place in the pages of a ‘real’ news source. ‘Spoilt Bastard’ is definitely modern MP material. The stories I’m currently editing for the anthology feel more ‘real’ than the stuff coming at me from the news. They are certainly better written and make a lot more sense.

This, of course, assumes there is a ‘real’ news source left on the planet. Most of them seem to print their own versions of reality, often with no regard to the reality of what is really happening in the world. The times they are a-changing, and lately the pace of change has quickened.

Not for the better. Not from where I’m sitting.

Currently, the House of Lards is trying to impose its own will on the people of this country. The House of Lards was meant to be a check on the House of Commons. It was supposed to be full of wise old fogeys who would look at the lunatic proposals of the whippersnappers in government and say ‘Hang on a minute…’

Not any more. Successive governments have stuffed that place with cronies. The Lards are appointed, not elected. We can’t vote for them and we can’t get them out of office. Lately they have their heads so far up their own orifices they are looking out from behind their own teeth. They are not supposed to make decisions, they are supposed to be there to temper the decisions made by the elected monkeys in the silly place we call Commons.

The House of Lards is becoming a de facto dictatorship. It’s no longer fit for purpose. Time to ditch it.

Or maybe replace the Lards with those guys in flat caps who used to sit in the corner of pubs (remember pubs?) with a whippet at their feet, smoking a pipe and sipping a black-and-tan. They’d do a much better job. Just keep them supplied with that dried horse manure they like to smoke and the beer that could legitimately be called a cocktail and that’s all they need. No £300 a day, they don’t need that much a week, and they don’t need to be supplied with big red Santa suits trimmed with dead ferrets either. We’d save a fortune and the country would be run better.

What about our elected leaders? What a bunch of shining little wits they are! Bickering like children and pushing their own personal prejudices and agendas as if the people who voted for them just don’t matter at all.

Which, of course, they don’t. Once they have been elected they are elevated to a degree of status that makes God scowl with envy and they can do whatever they please. Just because you voted for them doesn’t mean they have any intention of doing what they said they would do. You just vote. Once you’ve done that, fuck off home and keep out of the way. Important People have Important Things to do and you get to do what you are told by the people you elected to do what you wanted them to do.

Did you want them to totally screw up your life with ever-deeper control? Did you want them to take all the money you worked for and throw it away on their own pet projects? You didn’t? What a shame. That’s what they’re going to do anyway.

It is a constant comfort to me to know that nobody I’ve ever voted for has ever won an election. That might be because I vote based on the person, not the party. I vote for the one who sounds like they make sense. Those people are unlikely to get anywhere near government.

Again, the times they are a-changing. Turkey might be the fulcrum that tips this lever.

Donnie Trumpton won the election to be King of America. He’s not a career politician, he doesn’t speak like a politician, and that’s both good and bad. He does what he says he will do but the flip side is, if he’s said it he feels obliged to do it. Unlike politicians, he doesn’t think hard before speaking and then come out with some platitude that can be translated either way later on. He just Does Things.

He has declared war on Islam in a business fashion, not a political fashion. Not just the extreme Islam, all of it. Well okay, the extremists don’t wear a uniform so it’s hard to tell but this is a sledgehammer approach and while I personally don’t like it, it is in fact the only viable option left. The extremists have made it so. The moderates, the ordinary Muslims, aren’t dobbing in their crazy mates and are not reforming their religion to get rid of the nutters. They will be really surprised when they are rounded up and sent to camps. Ask the American Japanese about the last world war. It is happening again.

Christianity did have a Reformation. Oh there are still violent Christian nutters but you won’t find a single church anywhere who recognises them as part of their religion. Modern Christianity is all tea and cakes and when they speak to you, you’ll really believe they have no bones in their arms.

I used to be visited by Jehovah’s Witnesses often. Nice enough people. They invited me to events I never went to. They gave me their comics and I gave them mine. They were particularly keen on the New Scientist copy I gave them that spoke of blood transfusions and how they had never actually been clinically tested. It was the one describing artificial blood, quite a few years back.

Yet they never threatened me in any way at all. They invited me to join. I declined. That was fine by them. They’d ask again, I’d decline again. I never, ever saw a JW shriek and declare all unbelievers must be beheaded. You don’t want to join, they believe you’re losing out but the point is they give you the choice.

Oh I know the stories of what happens if you leave that group but basically it amounts to ‘Shun the non-believer!’. They don’t issue death threats or throw you off tall buildings and stone your splattered remains to be on the safe side.

Islam, however, is at the stage Christianity was at in the 15th century. When the Inquisition killed, in horrible ways, anyone who didn’t agree with them. Their courts were rigged. If you were accused then you must be guilty of something and punishment of some kind was inevitable and always brutal.

Turkey is an Islamic nation but the government is secular. At least that was the idea. Kamal Ataturk, the country’s founder, was a visionary and I would go so far as to say he was one of the great men of history. He separated State and religion from the outset. He must be so ashamed of what has happened to destroy his vision.

Turkey was once a great place to go for a holiday. Personally I won’t go to any country that even borders that place now. It’s fast turning into another North Korea.

If you believe the news.

If you do, then 30-year-old ‘refugees’ are children. There is no problem in Sweden, Malmo being the rape capital of Europe is an honour and they have put up a gold plaque to commemorate it. There are no cases of female genital mutilation in the UK, no beheadings in the UK, no riots in France or anywhere else, nothing is happening. Nothing to see here, move along, keep your head down and keep paying those taxes. All is well, your daughter’s grooming for a life of being gang raped while drunk is just part of their culture, innit?

The political demigods might be awakening to reality at last. In the Netherlands it looks like Geert Wilders is in with a real chance of winning next Wednesday’s election. The Turkish riots in that country might have secured his victory. The current bunch of feeble minded kowtowing Dhimmis have known this for a while and decided to ban Turkish politicians from campaigning in their country.

Turkey declares this as a Nazi-style move. Turkey allows no foreign politics to be campaigned in Turkey. Pot… Kettle… Politically Correct Very Dark Grey?

Or is that doubleplusgrey in Newspeak?

All this ramble, all this post, all these words, depend upon the veracity of sources. The news. Eye witness accounts, assuming they didn’t dream it after a bottle of whisky and a kebab. It could all be entirely wrong.

It could all be entirely right.

It could all be fantasy.

But look, the Leftie governments are clamping down on Islamic immigration and their general behaving like dicks just before elections that would pretty definitely see them all out of work. All over Europe.

Why? Because the opposition are promising to do something about the things real people in the real world are utterly sick of. The things all the Leftie governments pretend aren’t happening.

Sure, they want Trump discredited. He started it by breaking the first rule of politics – actually doing what he said he would do.

Now every country out there is looking for politicians who will do what they said they would do, and none of them are among the current elected monkeys. People want something new. Something true.

We want reality again. It’s been a long time.

But Muslims beware. You’ve had a really easy time in the West so far. It’s about to change and your life is going to get hard. Those countries you escaped from will seem like Utopia compared to what’s coming, I’d like to be sympathetic but you did nothing while evil people used your religion for their own ends. It’s probably too late to fix it now.

You can try. If you can be bothered.

It’s up to you now.

 

 

Rule by thuggery and threat

The Dreadful Arnott and her minions don’t like dissent. Not even a hint of it. Question the Righteous Ones at your peril!

It’s really not too surprising that the Politically Correct and Lifestyle Controllers never have a bad word to say about terrorists. They work in much the same way. Say the wrong thing and they turn on you. They’ll insult you, abuse you, even physically attack you. Try to defend yourself and they’ll claim you’re bullying them.

Oh they haven’t blown up smokers yet, but they’d like to. They did once come up with a computer game where you were a sniper on a rooftop, picking off smokers in the street. They have also encouraged children to snatch cigarettes from people smoking in the street. Really. All officially sanctioned.

Should any smoker dare to respond to these attacks, we are ‘being unreasonable’. They are ‘only trying to help’.

No they aren’t. They are being themselves. Their natural selves. Vicious, spiteful thugs.

They will say ‘smokers want the ‘right’ to smoke anywhere!’

No we don’t. We would quite like the right to smoke in our homes and cars – you know, our own property – but the antismokers don’t want to allow that. We smokers only want to be left alone. We don’t demand every establishment allows us to smoke. We never have. You can have nonsmoking pubs and restaurants, as many as you like. We won’t smoke in them.

Nut we can’t have even one smoking establishment. Not one. We are to be banned from smoking in the grounds of hospitals, in our own cars, and there are moves to ban it in private homes.

So who is being unreasonable? The smokers, who just want to be left alone, or the antismokers who want total control over everyone’s lives at all times?

I know, there are antismokers nudging each other and saying ‘Another bleating smoker’ but it’s not just the smokers.

Vapers are getting the same treatment. Booze is to be restricted and plain-packaged – warning labels will be first. As with smoking. Any non-approved foods (it’s not what you approve of that matters, it’s what your Masters approve for you) are going to be hiked in price soon, and what you can have will be so bland that you won’t feel like eating it.

That, of course, will solve the imaginary ‘obesity epidemic’.

It’s never going to stop. The control freaks will enlist your help to beat up a group they don;t like. They’ll tell you you can get bacterial infections from the residue of something that’s been burned, that you can get cancer from second hand steam, that one daily glass of sherry will make your liver die a slow and agonising death… it’s all lies.

People believe lies. They believe them no matter how ridiculously absurd you make them.

Every lie controls your life just that little bit more. Whether you smoke or not, whether you drink or not,. whether you live on burgers and chips or tofu and hand-knitted yoghourt.

These people do not want to control one group. They want to control everyone. Everyone.

Bit by bit, they’re getting there. Don’t think it can happen? It’s happened before, more than once.

Pass out the overalls, we’re about to become old style communist China. Or North Korea.

It can happen.

It’s happening right now. It’s so blatant that if you can’t see it, there’s only one reason.

You don’t want to.

 

The Immigrant Song

Nigel ‘Smoky-drinky’ Farage has been talking to an American audience at one of Donny Trumpton’s gigs. He is of the opinion that there is going to be a global revolution and the nationalist parties will take France, Germany and Holland – and zen ze Vorld! Hahahaha!

Well, not North Korea obviously. Nor China, nor Russia. Unlikely that anything in the rest of the world will ever affect Turkmenistan. Most of Africa won’t care. So maybe not all the world. Perhaps about a third of it.

I don’t know if ‘revolution’ is a good term here. It usually means the overthrow of a dictatorship but you can’t usually do that just by voting for it. They have elections in North Korea, you know. One candidate on the ballot form and voting is compulsory and not secret. It’s an utterly pointless exercise, it’s just there so Kim Jong Jingly Jangly can claim he was democratically elected.

If someone were to write ‘Nobby the Goblin’ under Kim Jong’s name and then draw a box with a cross in it, it’s not a spoiled ballot paper. It’s a warrant for that voter’s arrest. That’s a country that will only ever change with a real revolution or a spontaneous outbreak of sanity in the ruling family. The smart money is still on revolution as the only real option – hard to do in a country where everyone is under surveillance all the time.

What’s really happening is that the control freakery has got so bad, the life control so insistent and intense, that enough people want it gone. When that happens they vote for something else in the hope it will be less controlling.

There has been a nationalist/socialist party in Germany before. That didn’t go too well. I don’t know much about Holland’s past but I think France has been staunchly socialist since their Revolution. Well, people really couldn’t vote right-wing for a long time anyway because the revolutionaries cut the heads off all the potential candidates. A drastic, though admittedly effective, measure.

The Lefties would dearly love to do that again. They are always proclaiming and often actually perpetrating violence against those who don’t want to live under their control, while claiming victimhood. They’re not the only ones…

There is an immigrant issue and it’s largely Muslim. There, I said it. Now both the Muslims and the Lefties can start carving a wall plaque to hang my head on, in the name of peaceful coexistence.

I am not one of those who declares all Muslims are deranged Jihadis. This is clearly not the case. I have frequented many a Muslim-run shop or restaurant and found a polite and generous reception every time. Muslims have nutters in their ranks. So does every religious group out there. Christians are not so bad these days but there are parts of Christian history that are quietly pushed aside.

Even Hindus can turn nasty. Hindus! They won’t step on an ant or kill a cow but hoo boy, if you’re the wrong religion in some Hindu countries you have little chance of getting out of there alive.

What do we do about countries that radically disagree with our way of life? Simple. We don’t go there. It’s the cheap and easy way to solve the problem.

Currently though, Hindus, Sikhs and pretty much every other religious or ethnic group who settle in the UK don’t threaten to kill us all and impose their religious laws on us all. Sikhs are a warrior race but they don’t run screaming through the streets brandishing swords and cutting the heads off passers-by. The only time I remember Sikhs protesting was when there was a play running in London (I think) that directly insulted their religion. They reacted to provocation (who doesn’t?) but even then, all they wanted was the play shut down. They didn’t want to burn down every hairdresser’s shop in the country.

See, if you piss off Hindus in their own country then they might kill you. Their country, their laws. In the UK, they recognise that UK laws apply – so if you provoke a Hindu in the UK they will use UK law to make you stop. That’s perfectly fair and reasonable. Other immigrant groups do the same. They want to be here because they like it here and while they retain their own culture and beliefs, they fit in with the UK way of life.

Actually I have wondered sometimes. There was a Nigerian family that moved all the way up here to the North of Scotland and I never got around to asking how they coped with our winters. Nigeria doesn’t really have much in the way of winter. They’ve been here over a decade though so they’ve obviously adapted. I’ve moved out into the wilds now so I never see them any more.

The same is true of most of the Muslims here. They have adapted to UK life and while it gets damn cold here compared to most of their countries of origin, they know we won’t cut off their hands for stealing or stone them for adultery or behead them on a whim. Further, we will let them have mosques and won’t force them to change their religion. They can keep their own values and beliefs but becoming a UK citizen means accepting UK laws.

Some didn’t come here to escape the madness of their own countries. Some came here to make the madness global. You have to recognise the problem before you can do anything about it and the Lefties will not recognise it. They defend the loonies in Islam even though those loonies will kill them as soon as they win.

People say ‘But if there are moderate Muslims, why don’t they speak out?’

Imagine a world in which the Westboro Baptist Church was defended by the Lefties no matter what they did. Even the gay Lefties defended it in the same way they now defend Islamic loonies. So that little band of loonies gained power and deranged converts. Any other Christian speaking out against it would be shouted down and probably targeted for hate and a beating – both by Westboro and their Leftie defenders.

If you were a Christian in that world, would you speak out? You can say yes now because it’s a theoretical scenario that won’t happen but consider… the Lefties also run the child monitoring agencies. Your children could be taken away because you are a racist Westborophobic right wing bigot. And that would be just the start.

The Westboros would declare you a heretic and apostate and you would be ostracised and possibly killed. Your family too. Still think you’d speak out?

Not so sure? Now imagine you’re a Muslim family quietly and happily running a corner shop or a restaurant or maybe another business. Would you risk losing it all – and it means all. Absolutely all – by speaking out?

Yes, there are moderate Muslims. There were moderate Catholics during the time of the Inquisition and I fully believe there are many Hindus in Hindu countries who are appalled and disgusted at what their government does to those of other religions. Who will speak out when speaking out can get you and your family killed?

Who, in North Korea, would dare utter ‘Kim Jong ate all the pies, the fat bastard’? His brother did. From outside the country. He’s dead now.

If you want a UK Muslim to stand up and say ‘Saudi Arabia is run by maniacs who just like killing people for fun’ you have to promise that Muslim a change of name, location, face, and a 24-hour armed guard for the entire family forever. At least some of them think it, I can assure you, but saying it, well, they’d rather play handball with nitroglycerin. It’s less risky.

Look at what the Lefties do when a non-Muslim says ‘there are Muslim terrorists’. They’d do the same to a Muslim who said it. They’d marginalise them to the point where they would have no defence when the Islamists came for them. And they know it. So they keep quiet. Wouldn’t you? When you know you will be decrying murderous loonies and nobody will dare stand in your defence?

It’s not immigration that’s the problem. There’s always been immigration, everywhere. My mother’s family came from northern Italy. Might explain my predilection for leaving horse heads in enemies’ beds and my looking forward to the day someone comes to ask a favour on the day of my daughter’s wedding but even so, the family has integrated. I consider myself Welsh because that’s where I was born and I can now almost hold a conversation in Doric because that’s where I’ve lived for a few decades.

The Lefties aren’t reading this far. They hit outrage mode less than halfway down the post. Nothing after that will reach them. Don’t worry about them, they are off decrying me ‘racist’ even now.

I was in southern Ireland, in Dublin, in 1989. You could not get anyone to talk about the IRA much but they didn’t have universal support. It seemed most people didn’t really give a shit about Northern Ireland, they had their own lives to deal with. Really, I got the impression that only those who were obsessed with the island being one country were IRA supporters and most of them joined it. Just like Islamic Jihad.

The trouble was, speaking out against them could get you killed. Same thing. Who believes all the Irish were terrorists? The airport police did. An Irish co-worker – another PhD – was detained at the airport because of his name and accent.  So in the current wave of terrorism, if you give your name as Muhammad Ali, you are going to be treated as a potential terrorist using a fake name, even if it is your real name. It’s not at all surprising, is it?

Trump has the right idea but he’s cutting with a blunt knife. It’s not immigration he should target. It’s fanaticism. So should everybody else.

And not just Islamic fanaticism. All of it.

Especially the Leftie idiot enablers.

Oh, almost forgot :

Why is this news?

Apparently, warning children that snacks are going to make them fat just makes them want the snack more.

Surely every parent already knows this, starting with the very first parents right at the dawn of humanity? Tell a child they can’t have something and their brain immediately defaults to ‘You’re keeping the good stuff for yourself!’

They have to try it, to find out why it’s not allowed. Tell them not to touch fire and they’ll touch it to find out why. In that case only once, but tell them not to eat chocolate and they’ll test that assertion over and over.

The antismoking crusade is what drives children to smoking. It’s bad, it’s evil, you can’t have it… so they have to try it and find out for themselves. Some won’t like it, some will. The same goes for alcohol, sugar, salt… That’s because children are people, and people are all individuals with different likes and dislikes. Something modern medicine can’t seem to grasp.

Children aren’t stupid. Repellent, unhygienic and despicable yes, but not stupid.

Children want to be grown up. They want to try grown up stuff. Okay, when we grow up we realise we were far better off being children, but what child knows this apart from those of us who never really grew up?

So, tell them they can’t have it and it’s grown-up stuff. It exists therefore someone has it. It must be the grown-ups. They want it for themselves. Why can’t we have it?

The concept of ‘one day you’ll be a grown-up’ is entirely lost on children. On most adults too. They cannot envisage the future, only the past – and for children it’s often just the ‘now’. That’s why children don’t see consequences, and why most adults don’t see them either. They cannot think ahead. They don’t know how.

I’ll soon be 57. I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. Most people follow a path through life. Not me. I just bumble through and most of it (barring a few utter disasters) seems to work out. I’m alive, and eternally broke, but I can pay the rent and buy food and put petrol in the car so everything is good. I don’t want to be rich. There is nothing I need that much money for.

I remember being a child. I had a Dalek suit made of PVC. It was floppy and didn’t hold the Dalek shape but it was fun. Armed with a sink plunger and a whisk. I had a Scammel tank transporter steel toy and a tank (can’t remember which) to put on the back. I melted many, many toy soldiers on the coal fire.

I had Action Man toys, Batman’s Batmobile with plastic flame from the exhaust, Joe 90’s car, Bond’s Aston Martin, many many more. These would all be worth a fortune now if I had thought ahead. Kept them pristine and in their boxes. All are gone.

But I was a child. Joe 90 died in a mid-air collision with Thunderbird 2. Batman and Bond failed in their missions in spectacular style, involving a screwdriver and deadly curiosity. I took things apart to see how they worked. I was not thinking of the future. There wasn’t one. There was only ‘now’. The future happens after sleep and it’ll be the same as today.

Yeah, I was told not to touch the drinks cabinet. So obviously I had a go at the sherry, the easiest one to open. I was strangely uninterested in my dad’s cigarettes but then he never told me not to try them. Either he assumed I couldn’t light them, or that I wouldn’t be interested, or that it was so obvious he didn’t need to tell me. Whatever the reason, they weren’t on the banned list so weren’t interesting.

I have stuck a knife in the toaster and I have run with scissors. I’m still here. The scissors were closed and held point down and I unplugged the toaster before digging out the stuck crumpet. They don’t tell you that part. Just the overall ‘it’s dangerous’, not the way to make it not dangerous.

Snacks won’t make you fat unless you eat a lot of them and don’t move much. That is not the warning that’s ever given. There is no safe level of biscuits or crisps – that is the warning and it’s patently ridiculous.

Children see it. Medics and pressure groups don’t. Can you?

Bringing down Goliath

No, you don’t just need a slingshot and the power of God behind you. Although the slingshot can be a good starting point.

I recently made the old game ‘Doom’ work on an old Windows XP computer. Not the earliest DOS ones, this was ‘Ultimate Doom’, a later but still mainly DOS version with ‘slightly’ better graphics. Okay, not up to the absolute latest versions but the old graphics card in that machine will never run those.

I find that game relaxing. Nobody is on your side. If it moves it wants to kill you and some things that don’t move will try to kill you too. It’s simple. Shoot everything and don’t die.

It’s even more relaxing if you know how to apply the invulnerability cheat 😉

The game has a lot of different kinds of monsters and if you’re faced with a room full of different kinds, there’s no need to shoot. Just run through them (don’t get stuck) and out of another door. They will fire directly at you – even if another monster is in the way. The hit monsters will retaliate against the one who shot him.

Basically, you start a bar brawl then dodge out of the way until there are just a few left standing. Those left standing are already damaged and easy to pick off.

So yes, all you need is a slingshot. If none of the monsters notice you, hit one with a rock and it’ll start firing. That will set off an escalation of violence and you’re safely out of the way while it happens.

In real life, it’s safer to find a useful idiot to start the fighting but the principle holds true.

It’s the step between ‘divide’ and ‘conquer’. If you divide an army into smaller groups, you still have to fight all the groups one by one. Isn’t it so much easier to divide a nation into segments and get those segments to wipe each other out?

The last one standing will be so damaged you can take them out with a few stern words. Even better, as William of Orange found when James II made a royal fuck-up of running England, they might even ask you to intervene.

Is it hard to cause division followed by strife? Ha! It’s a doddle. We all know long-time friends who no longer speak to each other over some trivial argument. We all know someone who likes to spread rumours and then sit back and watch people fight about the tales they’ve told.

Scaling that up is much easier than you’d think. The current political system in almost every country makes this child’s play.  Whatever one side wants, the other opposes it. Even if they secretly agree with it. The division is there, you just have to tip it into violence. The left like to use violence so they’re always the side to choose to provoke. The Right are too cynical. The Left believe pretty much anything.

So what you need is the left to have the upper hand for a while and then make them feel like they’re losing everything.

It needed Tiny Blur. Charismatic and not too far left so the more stable will vote for him. Enough teeth to make a dentist’s eyes fill with money signs and yet not too large as to scare a voter.  Replace Iron Knickers with Monochrome Man and anyone is more interesting. Steve Davis could have won that one.

The manipulations behind the scenes aren’t really hard to see. They think we’re all stupid so they don’t hide all that well.

You see, if we had let the UK continue under Thatcherite policies there would have been grumblings and mumblings and occasional riots but no uprising. No war. The Left had no power so weren’t losing anything. The right without power won’t rise up. They have jobs and real lives and everything and don’t all work for government so they pay taxes, not sponge off them. You need to get the Left to lose and lose big so they turn violent.

What do you give someone with nothing to lose? Something to lose.

Then make sure they lose it. Fast and unexpectedly.

Brexit – the country voted, the losing side turned nasty. America – the country voted, the losing side turned very nasty. It gets nastier every time.

And sillier. Superbowl – the Patriots won, the other side’s fans actually took to the streets to protest! Seriously? Protesting the result of a fucking football game? Oh, how easy is it going to get?

What’s next? Riots because the wrong player won Wimbledon or News at Ten started five minutes late? Well… More likely riots if Jeremy Kyle retired or the wrong character gets the pub in EastEnders.

Oh it gets better. Tessie May rushed to be first to visit Donnie Darko (wait, no, Donnie Trumpton) on becoming King of the Seven Planets (no, wait, Emperor of the American Empire) then Gimli the Speaker of the House of Morons says Donnie can’t visit Moria (no, wait,  Parliament).

‘He’ll taste the edge of my axe if he shows up here’ is one made-up quote attributed to Gimli. As is ‘No, no, not the beard!’ and ‘Tallness is an abomination and should be illegal’.

So we have the Prime Monster sensibly keeping well in with the country with the biggest army and nuclear arsenal and the idiot Speaker trying to wreck relations with the country that might be our biggest trading partner once we are free of the EU.

Didn’t Tiny Blur rush to be first to congratulate Barry O’Blimey on becoming Dark Lord of the Yankee Horde? How is that so different? Oh, I see, Barry was a Leftie king. Donnie is a Rightie king. We live in a world where left is right and right is wrong. It all makes sense now.

It’s as bad as the confusion I experienced when moving between Wales and Scotland during my PhD. It was the beer that confused me.

In Cardiff there is Brains’ Beers. It was originally Brian’s Beers but the signwriter had enjoyed some free samples and well, they’d paid for the sign so they let it go.

Anyway. There were several beers in their range at the time. I preferred SA, we never knew what it really stood for but we called it Skull Attack for reasons you can probably guess.

There was Light, which was a pale bitter beer of low strength so you could have one or two at lunchtime and still function, and there was Dark, a dark coloured beer of a similar colour to Guinness but nowhere near as solid in your stomach.

In Scotland, McEwan’s also had dark beer and light beer but their classification was based on the specific gravity of the beer, not the colour. So the dark coloured beer was ‘Light’ and the amber coloured one was ‘Heavy’.

Dark is light and light is heavy. Try working that one out after you’ve clocked up a few hours in the pub.

It’s no real surprise then to find that now, left is right and right is wrong. The world has been screwed up for a long time.

Back to the game. Not the computer game, the real one. What’s our diminutive David doing to poor Goliath at the moment?

Well. The recent Paris attack was reported by the BBC and the report said, not once but several times, the machete man shouted “All of you, at the bar!” and took pains to point out this means God is Grapes in Arabic. They used to take the same amount of effort to avoid saying that.

The UN let a spokesman admit, very clearly, that the whole Global Warming scam was intended to change the world economic system, destroy capitalism and ultimately massively reduce the world’s population. Admit it why? Now? When everyone is already angry?

France is likely to have to choose between a far left and a far Right candidate for president. The Left one wants to let even more car-burning and shopper-shooting immigrants into France, the Right one wants to stop that. Put aside your indoctrination for a moment and imagine it’s you parking a car in France and going to the shops. Who would you pick?

Russia and America. The countries that could be sniffing each others’ arses like dogs while China wipes us all out (reminds me of the Brian Aldiss tale ‘All The World’s Tears’) and tow big bosses at the end of the video game.

In one of the ‘Doom’ variants you come up against a cyberdemon and a queen spider. It’s easy. Both are really hard to kill so run between them and then hide. They both start firing and they’ll hit each other.

Wait for one of the superpowers to wipe out the other and the last one left is weakened to the point where it’s easy.

The people are getting angry and the coals are being added to the fire daily. This boiler is under pressure. There’s no release valve. There can be only one outcome and it’s the one that was always intended.

So where are we? Russia. America. Love/hate/no-trust. What’s left of the rapidly collapsing EU. A pressure for a communist style future. Population control. Suppression of all those annoying riots and terrorists.

Where is the saviour? Who will fight off the now-revealed enemies? Revealed all at once as a shock tactic to get a reaction. Who will save us from our own terrible excesses? Who has been big and quiet through it all?

Where is the modern William of Orange?

China.

Mae win ti

 

 

But… they aren’t doing it. They are puppets too.

Russia’s Most Wanted

I don’t know how true all this is, but the news keeps popping up.

It seems George Soros, a man with far more money than he has time left to spend it, has been intent on bringing down the entire Russian Federation (and, apparently, most of the rest of the world). Could one man really do all this damage?

Well, with enough money and influence and an army of dim lackeys, especially when your dim lackeys manage to get elected, it’s not impossible to imagine – although as the plot of a novel it would really have to have James Bond in it somewhere.

But then you don’t need 007 when you have Vladimir Putin. The man clearly just doesn’t give a damn what anyone thinks of him as long as Russia is happy with him being President. Russia, it seems, is largely pretty much okay with him being in charge. I have to admit he does seem to be the most clear-headed and actually adult of all the world leaders at the moment. Even though he’s a commie.

Sure there are protests in Russia – what leader hasn’t had to deal with protests (apart from Kim Jong Jinglyjangly who just shoots them all)? On balance though, Russia seems quite content with Putin in charge.

There are allegations that Soros used Danish and Swedish currency derivatives to try to damage the Russian stock market. How? I have absolutely no idea how that works but it seems Russia is pretty pissed off at Denmark and Sweden as a result. It didn’t work anyway.

Now it seems Putin has issued an arrest warrant for Soros which I think can only work if Soros goes to Russia, or a Russian territory. So all he has to do is not go there. I think he’s already banned from there anyway, so maybe an arrest warrant is overkill.

This Soros guy definitely warrants further study. I’d heard of him before, he keeps cropping up, but he does sound like he might be in there with Bloefeld and the other Bond villians.

I wonder if he has a high backed black swivel chair and a cat? I do hope so.