One of those annoying rambling posts

Chaos is so far averted, but it could strike at any moment. Preparations continue with a goal of being out of here by the end of the month. I would prefer it stayed amicable but I know it won’t. It’s just a matter of time now, and not much time at that.

I now have one of those magic phones that cram the entirety of the internet into something that looks like a coaster. It’s about as thick as a coaster too so I have ordered a cover to keep it alive. It could be my only internet link for a time.

It’s a Lumia 535. I bought the phone and added a contract SIM with 4 Gb per month internet time. Carphone Warehouse have a deal that included £36 cashback so I got the phone for just over £50. Which seems cheap considering what this little thing is capable of doing.

If you buy a Microsoft phone, connect it to your WiFi first. It’s Microsoft. It is going to download updates as soon as you turn it on. So far it has downloaded a gigabyte of updates, fortunately all through the WiFi so it hasn’t used a quarter of my monthly internet time.

I hesitate to call it a phone because I’m not really sure how you go about making phone calls with it. It does let me flip between Twitter accounts, it has Farcebok on there (I haven’t tried linking to that yet) and Skype too. Yes, the phone has a phone app.  I can log into the blog from my phone now. From my bloody phone!

There was a time, not all that long ago, when only posh people had a phone in the house. Now every Tom Dick and Harry has one in their pocket. I understand how my grandmother felt now. She was born before the invention of the motor car and might have reached her teens before seeing one.

Anyway, it is no longer possible to permanently separate me from the internet. No matter what happens, the Underdog will continue.

The other big part of the current exodus is selling stuff on eBay. I have accumulated a great deal of stuff, and find now that I care for very little of it. It was all just distractions. I could walk away and leave it all and not think about any of it ever again but much of it has a cash value. Cash is in short supply and I’m going to need some. If I’m really stuck, my brother has offered to help out, as have quite a few of you readers. I would prefer not to impose, if at all possible, but I appreciate the offers nonetheless.

There is a great deal of cash tied up in stuff here. A surprising amount. That’s before I even really touch the railway stuff – I have surplus there but might not need to sell yet. It could remain as an investment for the future.

I have to sell the banjo. A five string banjo best played with a six fingered hand. I haven’t learned to play it yet and don’t have the time now. That, I think, I will take to the local banjo shop and see what I can get second hand. It’s actually a local music shop but since the only thing I bought in there is this banjo…

It could go on eBay but I really don’t trust the post with this.

I found all the stuff for the takedown recurve bow and will put a picture here before it goes on eBay. Since eBay take 10% I can sell at 10% less than the average eBay price and get the same. I also have two pistol crossbows and a full size one but I bet the post office will get all sniffy about taking those. The swords, I think I’m stuck with those forever.

I have a carousel slide projector which surprised me somewhat. I thought I’d got rid of that years ago! One for the dump, nobody wants them now.

Oh and someone was interested in my old microscope slides a while back. I have a nice wooden box containing 100 prepared teaching slides that’s going up for sale. Details on request.

I own a Rotozip Rebel. I have used it, and I still have all my fingers. This will surprise many of you, I know. It is possibly the single most dangerous power tool ever devised and so I simply had to have one. My house has inset shelving in one wall thanks to the devastating evilness of this little drill/saw/grinder/death machine. It’s a wonderful thing but I don’t need it any more.

There’ll be more power tools going on eBay. Not the scroll saw. I need that. Nor the Dremel. I need that too. And I need all the power drills because… well, power drills. What else need I say? I know every guy out there is nodding sagely and every woman is rolling her eyes but hey… power drills, right?

Did I mention before that the baker gave me whisky? The last week has involved mornings in Gadget Shop and evenings in Local Shop and air at home you’d need the finest ceramic knife to cut and about 4 hours sleep a night so it was all a bit hazy. I nearly went full Romulus on the staff at one point midweek. Which would have been a shame. They don’t deserve that.

Anyhow, the baker gave me a bottle of Glenmorangie for the little chairs and table. I didn’t expect any return on those, they were done for the fun of it but being appreciated feels pretty good, I’m finding. The bottle remains unopened so far. I could have cracked it open last night since today was a day off but a week of little sleep and no alcohol followed by a blast of whisky would have floored me.

I think that is what is known as ‘common sense’. It’s a new concept. All part of the underdog update that’s being gradually downloaded into me 😉

I’m being upgraded to Underdog 2.0 from Underdog 1.0.fuckit  It seems like a massive improvement to me

And so it seems I managed to trade plum tree sticks for posh whisky. Purely by accident. Is it odd that I see nothing unusual in this?

You know, I really thought I was the only one n my situation until I told you all what it was, It seems it’s common. Wife tormentors get reported but husband tormentors rarely do. We guys like to pretend we can cope but you know, even the hardest of us just crack sometimes.

We’re human. Sometimes we forget that.