Fantasy becomes reality.

A somewhat surreal post tonight, possibly brought on by the madness resulting from trying to stay in 10538’s head for hours and perhaps influenced by Black Bottle, who have finally renounced their green bottle shaped like a rather scary thing you might see on the BDSM circuit. The whisky is once more in black glass, in a bottle reproducing their original from 1879 – 1914 (the bottles were made in Germany so they became somewhat difficult to get hold of after 1914). I just hope they are not now getting the black glass from Russia. That would be a bit of a bugger.

It tastes the same but the experience is definitely improved by not having to pour it from a large green butt-plug.

Fortean Times’ latest issue is taken with the Slender Man, the entirely fabricated being that inspired two little American girls to try to kill another girl. There have been other instances of Slender Man’s malevolent influence but here’s the kicker – he does not exist at all. Not in anyone’s mythology. He is not even a hoax. The Slender Man first appeared in two pictures in an online Photoshop competition to see who could make a subtle yet really scary image. It was declared as Photoshop from the outset. There was never any intent to deceive anyone at all. The original images have been shown over and over again, with the photoshopper given credit.

And yet the drones believe it is real. We’ll come back to that.

An analysis of UFO sightings down the ages has linked them to aerotechnology and then to movies. Maybe there are real alien UFO’s, I don’t know (or much care, although if one is ever proven then I will suddenly become very interested indeed). Early sightings described things that looked like balloons and blimps, rare at the time so for most people they were, indeed, ‘unidentified’. Then the saucers followed the early space films, then there were black triangles seen everywhere at night just before those radar-dodging planes were suddenly in air force operation. Shaped like… black triangles. Of course they did the test flights at night. Of course the local airport didn’t see them on radar. That was the whole point of them.

Plans for saucer-shaped aircraft were drawn up by the Nazis in WWII and the Americans, at least, have tried to make one. There is an old film somewhere of a trial flight. It was horribly unstable and difficult to control. Maybe they have now succeeded. If someone saw a highly secret aircraft on a test flight, what would be the air force response?

a) “Oh yes, that was one of our highly secret test aircraft.”

b) “No such aircraft exists, you are eating too much sugar and hallucinating.”

I’ve missed out an awful lot but you get the idea. The abductions are all pretty similar too, apart from the first recorded one, Antonio Villas-Boas, who had a steamy romp with an alien. Everyone since then just seems to get probes shoved up their bums. Maybe it’s the aliens’ idea of revenge.

Or maybe they are being secretly screened for colon cancer by the NHS… you need two tinfoil hats for that one.

Note that I’m not looking anything up tonight. This is a babble from memory, such as it is. There might be errors and wild deviations from reality, it depends how far down the bottle I get. As it’s now black glass it’s actually quite hard to tell. The typo-count will be the giveaway that I’ve passed half way.

If you doubt the Nazis would try to make something mad that flies, check out the Dornier range of aircraft. That guy was definitely on the good stuff.

Crop circles are a load of shit. The plain circles can be formed by the weather. The artistic ones are formed by men with planks and string. Britain gets an awful lot of tornadoes, you know. I’ve seen a few here. The difference is that most of ours don’t touch down, and those that do rarely do it anywhere anyone will notice. We don’t get the Kansas twisters but once in a while, one rips through a city. The almost-touchdown ones will easily form a perfect circle in any crop without sending anyone to Oz.

Most ghosthunters of the past never saw anything at all in haunted houses. They didn’t have the digital cameras that pick up infrared and turn dust into ‘orbs’ and they never saw a manifestation. Those things happened at seances (often with the help of muslin and luminous paint) but belief in ghosts goes back to before humans learned to speak.

UFOs, ghosts, crop circles made by aliens, is any of it real? There has been so much fakery it’s almost impossible to tell. Maybe some of it is real but picking out the real from the fantasy is as much fun as looking for a strand of hay in a stack of needles. You try getting in amongst the believers and that is exactly how it feels when you start asking awkward questions. It’s like going to Mecca and saying ‘but it’s just a black rock, what’s the big deal?’

I do not recommend you try that. Not unless you are backed by air support and many, many tanks.

In Tibetan lore (I might not get this quite right, I am working with no notes) there is a thing called a tulpa. A thought form. You concentrate and meditate until you bring your imagined thing into reality. One person can make it real for themselves although nobody else sees it. I’ve never tried. If I did, and succeded, she probably wouldn’t fancy me anyway.

But what if you connect a huge part of humanity through the internet and they all believe the same thing? This blog and many others have demonstrated over and over that most of humanity will believe whatever they are told to believe. Controlling thought is depressingly easy. Whether a thought form can be brought into reality doesn’t matter all that much. Reality doesn’t matter all that much. What matters is what people believe.

All this satanism nonsense is of no real consequence until you realise that whether Satan is real or not does not matter. Satanists believe and they will slip a real knife between your real ribs because they believe Satan told them to. Whether Satan is real or not, you’re just as dead.

Likewise the mad Mullahs who will strap bombs to themselves and spread themselves liberally over the surrounding area because they believe that Allah will give them 72 virgins. It doesn’t say that they are female virgins. It doesn’t even say they are human virgins. Before you press the mince-button you guys, you might want to give that some thought.

Then there are the modern Satans. The paedophiles. A word which translates to ‘loves children’ but in a far too literal sense. What does not make sense is that any Satan would want his potential future followers to utterly despise his current ones. Child abuse is not a real part of satanism. When Aleister Crowley talked of ‘sacrificing a child’ he was talking about anal sex  The act of procreation defiled in that it is the act but cannot result in the product. He sacrificed the child before it was conceived. To put it crudely, he shot his potential offspring right into the sewer. Like a politician, except he only did it with his offspring, rather than yours.

Anna Raccoon has been debunking the new Beelzebub’s crimes for some time. Jimbo Saliva has been demoted from small-boy bugerrer to procurer of small boys for other buggers. There is no evidence he did it himself so he must have been a go-between for someone else. That ‘someone else’ must have been a Satanist because… well… because.

I always regarded Saliva as a creepy wierdo but the revelation that he sometimes availed himself of the young girls who threw themselves at him is not a surprise. There has been nothing to suggest he was into toddlers like so many of the really nasty ones. There has been plenty to suggest that he was not even present at so many of his alleged crimes. He has become, like Gary Glitter, a tulpa. A thought form brought into reality by the fears of parents, encouraged by the likes of the Daily Mail.

So we come back to the Slender Man. He was not real and never intended to be. Not even intended to be pretend real. Not a hoax. Yet he is having real effects on people even though he does not exist.

Okay, I can see all the ghost stories and UFO tales and so on being taken as real. Those people really, genuinely believed it happened and maybe it did. I have nothing to prove otherwise. I have to accept that they believe something happened and have to accept that they might have been right. Unless it’s orbs. Then they are talking out of their arses.

But Slender Man was not a mistake. Not a hoax. He was declared as a fabrication from the outset. He was a Photoshop entry in a competition. No mythos. No backstory. Purely made up.

Many people now believe he is real. He is not, he cannot be, he has been repeatedly proven not to be, but they steadfastly believe it anyway.

Do we create reality? There is a theory that says so.

As for me, I just think that people are unbelievably stupid and will believe anything at all if presented correctly.

So far, it’s worked every time.